


Keeping Promises

by ChildoftheFeywilds



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/F, Fanfic, How Do I Tag, OC, Original Character(s), Sorry Not Sorry, but here it is lol, im sorry, no one asked for this, x Reader
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-16
Updated: 2020-12-17
Packaged: 2021-03-09 05:08:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 11
Words: 30,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27049204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ChildoftheFeywilds/pseuds/ChildoftheFeywilds
Summary: Completed.Eleanor Greene is not all that fond of Tara, but, the brunette has a way of making her smile.Though she would never admit that aloud.Yes, this is a wlw fic. Yes, it is a Tara Chambler x OC. I'm sorry but I love her LMFAO.
Relationships: Tara Chambler/Original Character(s), Tara Chambler/Reader, Tara Chambler/You
Comments: 4
Kudos: 10





	1. Episode One ~ After (S4;E9)

**Author's Note:**

> So, no one asked for this but I started bingeing TWD again and I have a deep love for one (1) Tara Chambler.
> 
> Eleanor Greene is portrayed by Caity Lotz in this, so if you don't know her (pleaseeee) look her up. She is wonderful. 
> 
> Disclaimers: I do not own any of the characters from The Walking Dead nor do I have any claim on the show. I'm just a fan who got an idea.

Everything hurts. Pain flares through Nell’s chest and left side with every slow intake of air. Trying to force her eyes opens feels damn near impossible, but she does. Only to immediately slam them shut again because of the blinding sunlight that meets her face. Finally, the woman snaps out of it as the sound of groans and shuffling meets her ears.   
The Governor. His people. The tank. Gunfire. The explosion. Walkers.  
Forcing herself into a seated position, the blonde nearly cries out in pain. Glancing down at herself, Nell has to bite back bile as it rises in the back of her throat. Her left hip and lower ribs are burnt - the center a deep charded red with deep black and purple bruises spreading across her torso -. The hole in her shirt is singed, as is her left sleeve from the elbow down, her arm covered in small burns and gashes.   
The groans and gnarled breaths below her remind Nell of the reality she is trapped in. Despite the pain, the woman forces herself onto her knees before shifting onto her feet. Nell glances around herself, realizing somehow she ended up on a busted stairway during the explosion.   
The exterior wall of the cellblock is gone, showing the destroyed prison yard beyond it. And an endless sea of roaming walkers. Now what? Nell can’t help the silent question. The staircase is busted on either side of her, stranding her in the middle. The walkway she thought she had been on before is a couple of yards from her now and maybe three feet about her head. Dead end.   
The rest of the staircase however is gone. Leaving her on an island - maybe eight or seven feet above the group of walkers in the cell block. Counting heads, there are maybe fifteen of them. Her backpack is snagged on what's left of one of the railings, three feet out over the ledge. In it, she knows she has a spare pistol, a bottle of water, a cheap first aid kit, her notebook, and her spare jacket. On her person, Nell realizes she still has her bow - and quiver - as well as her machete.   
Thinking for a beat, the woman pulls her machete free of her belt and grips onto the railing still attached to the staircase island. Leaning as far out as she is comfortable doing, Nell uses the dull side of her machete and carefully tries to unhook her pack. After nearly dropping her bag - which truly would have screwed her - Nell manages to grasp the pack and pull it to her chest as she takes a quick knee.   
Water, check. Spare pistol, check. Five rounds, check. Jacket, check. Notebook, check. Makeshift first aid kit, check. Spare clothes, check. Nell pulls the jacket on, wincing as the coarse fabric catches the scrapes on her arm. She zips it up, giving her side a thin layer of protection. Then she tucks the pistol into the back of her belt. Safety on, of course.   
She takes a moment to gather herself and pull the backpack on over her shoulders before glancing once more around the small island she’s found herself on. Nell counts the heads of walkers again, noting a few have left the cellblock or at least her line of sight. On the far side of the cellblock, the doorway leading further into the prison is slightly ajar.   
Again, Nell glances around herself and crouches down - despite the sharp spear of pain it shoots through her left side. She slowly pulls her bow over her shoulder and takes one of the few arrows she has left from her quiver. Drawing the string of the bow back. Nell bites her tongue and ignores the screaming protest of her ribs and arms as she takes aim at the metal door.   
Nell counts to ten before letting the arrow sore through the air. The resounding clank as the door flies open and smacks against the wall behind it immediately has the attention of the small horde in the cell block.   
Nell doesn’t waste a second, quickly pulling her bow over her shoulder again and getting to her feet, and moving to the last step of her little island of sanctuary. Now or never. The blonde maneuvers herself over the edge and begins to lower herself. The explosion of pain that sears through every nerve in Nell’s body, however, is so sudden and fierce that she doesn’t realize she is falling until her back smacks the cement floor.   
She doesn’t register her own yelp of pain either. Not until Nell hears the walkers growl and moving back towards her. “Fuck!” Nell scrambles to her feet, “Fuck, fuck, fuck.” Nell clutches her ribs as she dashes towards the opposite door and glances over her shoulder. Shit, you never look over your shoulder when you’re running away, dumbass!  
But the walker already has a hold of Nell’s thick hair. Yanking her backward a step as it’s other hand reaches for her throat.   
“Eleanor!” A hand snatches hold of her arm - pulling her forward - and Nell finds herself the rope in a game of deadly tug-of-war for a brief second. The blonde barely has time to process Glenn - in riot gear - trying to pull her to him before a knife flashes in her peripheral vision. Suddenly, Nell feels a sharp tugging on her hair before the tight grip of the walker falls away and she stumbles into the man.   
“Run!” Nell doesn’t need to be told twice. Sprinting forward, Nell drags Glenn behind her as they both run through the maze-like halls of the prison. It only takes the pair moments to break through and outside into the bright sunlight. The yard is in chaos, fires all over, and walkers covering every inch of ground.   
A part of Nell thinks this is where she will die. In the yard of a place, she thought of as home, being torn apart by flesh-eating monsters. But she still needs to find her father and her sisters. And that thought pushes her forward - Glenn is right beside her and the two hack through every walker that gets too close. Before she knows it, Nell is at the gate and turning to Glenn. “We’re almost there-!”  
Glenn isn’t as close as he had been before, instead, the taller man is standing a few yards away staring at one of the prisons gated off garage entries. “Glenn-”  
“We can’t leave her!” Glenn stabs a walker in the head before running to the gate, and Nell follows. Because what else is she supposed to do?  
The stranger has her knees pulled to her chest and a pistol loosely grasped in her hands. She doesn’t flinch when Glenn snatches the weapon away. “Who are you?” Nell asks as she realizes she does not recognize this woman - meaning she was a part of the Governor's group. Her knuckles turn white from how tightly she is gripping her machete.   
“It’s full,” Glenn states, referring to the pistol magazine in his hand. “You didn’t fire a single bullet did you?” He directs his question to the woman. She doesn’t respond.  
“If you didn’t fight then why the hell are you here?” Nell snaps, her voice sharp and judgemental. She barely registers her sudden loss of balance over the aching of her body as she grasps onto the chain-link fence keeping the three of them separated from the horde outside.   
“Are you okay?” Glenn asks, looking at Nell with worried eyes.  
Nell ignores the man and grits her teeth. “Give me one good reason we should trust you.”   
For the first time, the stranger reacts. Her shoulders arching up to her ears as she fights to find words. “I- I can’t-”  
“We need her help, Nell.” Glenn cuts in. He ignores the fury behind Nell’s eyes as he hands the stranger back her pistol - along with Glenn's knife. The brunette woman stares. “You’re gonna help us find our people.”   
A heavy silence falls over the trio for a moment as they all seem to realize the situation they are all in together. Nell is the first to move, walking a few steps over to the gate and bracing herself against it as another wave of pain racks through her body.   
“You okay?” Glenn asks again, both him and the stranger staring at Nell’s slightly hunched over form.   
The blonde waves him off. “I’ll be fine, let’s just get the hell outta here.”  
Glenn relents and nods as he kneels down to go through his backpack. He spends several minutes rifling through the bag, pulling out random items. But only one catches the blondes attention - a bottle of aged whiskey. It only takes her a beat to realize it before she is reaching for it.   
Though she misses Glenns sharp look, Nell relishes the burn of the liquor as it flows down her throat. She takes a second quick swig before pulling the bottle from her lips and passing it back to Glenn. The man gives Nell a stern look before shoving the rag into the end of the bottle. A molotov cocktail.   
“Are you two ready?” Glenn asks as he pulls a lighter from his pocket. Both women nod. At their approval, Glenn lights the molotov and yanks open the gate door. The glass shatters over an old car and within seconds flames have engulfed the vehicle.   
“Alright,” Glenn gets the two womens attention. “I’ll cover you both, but we have to stick together. I can’t do this alone.” With that, the man rushes ahead of the two, taking care of two walkers that noticed them quickly.   
The trio run. And they run. Nell tries to keep the sudden ache in her chest at bay. This is their home they are running away from. This place was supposed to be their safe haven - they were never meant to have to run away from here.  
Nell doesn’t realize she’s reached the gate before the others, or just how much she has slowed down during their sprint - not until the brunette woman slips an arm under Nell’s left and supports her weight on her own shoulder.  
They keep running. They race through the woods for what feels like an eternity. Not slowing down until they reach the main road. And even then, Nell nearly crashes into one of the abandoned cars from her own momentum. She pulls away from the stranger and instead braces herself against the hood of the car.  
“Did you see if any of our people got out?” Glenn eventually asks after they have all caught their breath again.   
Nell finally looks away from the dull hood when the stranger answers. “All I saw was my sister in that field… She has a gun, but they - they just swarmed her. She wasn’t supposed to be there.” She shakes her head as she turns away from the pair. “I did it for him, I trusted him. And then he just killed that old man.”   
“Hershel,” Glenn starts, “Was his name-”  
Nell nearly trips at the other woman’s last sentence. Her heart drops before anger floods her veins and she charges past Glenn to grab a hold of the brunette's arm, pulling her around to face her. “What was his name?”  
“I’m sorry.” The brunette barely manages the words, “I’m so sorry.”  
And suddenly, Nell feels like she can’t breathe. Like a rope was wrapped around her lungs and has been pulled taut. “No.” The blonde turns away and shoves Glenns when he tries to stop her. She makes it all but three steps before her knees buckle and meet the hard road. The road bites into her palms as biles burns up the back of Nell’s throat. “No, no, no, no.”  
Nell can feel the tears burning behind her eyes. Her fist slams against the asphalt before she realizes she has even raised her hand. All she can do is repeat the word ‘no’ like a broken record as she tries to convince herself that it couldn’t have been her father.  
“Brain, that man, told us you were bad people. I know it’s not true. I can see it’s not, so what we did, what I did… I mean, I’m a piece of shit. Why would you want my help?”  
“I don’t want your fucking help!” Nell snaps, her eyes locking on the stranger as she snarls and pushes herself back onto her feet. “I don’t want you anywhere near me.”  
“But we need it.” Glenn slowly states, staring at Nell before he looks at the other woman again. “We need to find Maggie. I need to.”   
“Who’s Maggie?” She slowly asks, shaking her head.   
“Maggie is my sister -” Nell states harshly.  
“And she’s my wife.” Glenn finishes.   
“You guys got separated?”   
“I was on the bus and then got off to help and she didn’t see me.” Glenn states.   
“How do you know she made it?” The stranger asks.  
“Because she did.” Nell snaps again, looking to the ground as Glenn moves away. “She had to.”  
“Look, I don’t know if she did.” Glenn slowly says, “But Hershel, Nell’s father, was a great man. And he told me all I had to do was believe and that’s what I’m gonna do.”  
“What about Beth?” Nell slowly asks, looking from the woman to Glenn, “She had to have made it out right?”   
“She was on the bus.” Glenn nods, offering Nell a weak smile before looking at the stranger again. “None of us should be alive right now… She got out, they both did. So, you’re gonna help us find them… Things aren’t over.. They’re not over.” With that, the man steps around the other woman and begins down the road. Nell slowly begins to follow him.   
“I want to believe that.” The brunette calls after the pair, watching them walk past her. “I want to.” But whatever the woman is about to say is cut short by the snarls of the dead.   
Glenn doesn’t hesitate to shrug off his backpack and pull out his knife. Moving quickly towards the small group of walkers. “You have to.”  
Nell watches for a moment as Glenn easily takes out the first walker with his knife before she herself moves forward and swings her machete at the closest monster. The sharp blade passes clear through the walker's skull. The force Nell put behind the slash nearly knocks her off balance, but she quickly recovers and moves onto the next walker. Each swing becomes angrier and more aggressive. With every swing, Nell loses some of her control.   
Nell wipes around when she hears gasping - just in time to see Glenn fall. The other woman is already closing the distance between herself and the man, and Nell is just behind her. Nell’s feet are no longer under her, she realizes it in the brief few seconds she’s off the ground. And then she is tumbling head over heel into the ditch along the road.   
Pain courses through her ribs and arm, she can feel the blood soaking into her clothes already - warm as it stains her shirt and jacket. She can’t even fully register what’s happened before the walker is on top of her. Her forearm is the only thing keeping the things jaws from tearing into her throat. Bloody drool splattering across her face and neck.   
Nell curses as the walker forces it’s whole weight down onto her, struggling to shove against the beast - something under her digs into her back at the action - but it doesn’t matter. Pain or death. That’s it for a brief second before the walker is suddenly kicked off of Nell’s chest.  
The stranger jumps over the blonde and slams the stock of Glenn's rifle into the walker's head. Knocking it to the ground once more before she bashes it’s skull in with the rifle. It’s then that Nell recognizes the sound of a running truck. She looks up just in time to see it come to a complete stop and park at the top of the small ditch on the road.  
“Hope you enjoyed the show, assholes!” The woman yells, flinging out her arms as she steps between the vehicle and Nell. The blonde stumbles back to her feet, moving over to Glenn's unconscious body just as three strangers step out of the military truck.   
“You got a damn mouth on you, you know that?” A large, red-haired man states, raising his rifle to rest on his shoulder as he studies the other woman. “What else you got?”


	2. Episode Two~ The Drive (S4:E10)

“Alright God,” Nell whispers to herself, keeping her eyes focused on the horizon as the truck jerks along with every bump in the road. “Daddy always believed you had a plan, and - Well, I’ve never been as sure as him, I think you know that. But, if you are real if you’re really there… Watch out for them. Keep Beth and Maggie safe…”  
Nell’s eyes glaze over slightly as emotion threatens to rack through her body. “Let me find my sisters... That’s all I ask. It’s all I’ll ask because you know just as well as I do that I can’t do this without them. I can’t.”  
Nell’s quiet sentence trails off as the truck rolls to a stop. She and Tara, as the other woman finally introduced herself, share a quiet look. They both stand, Tara grabbing Glenn’s rifle from beside his still prone form, cocking it, and checking the ammo.   
Nell moves to the hatch, her bow over one shoulder as she eyes the three walkers that have gathered there. She grips the recurve bow debating on pulling it loose when Tara appears next to her and aims the rifle.   
“Do not fire that weapon.” The red-haired man, a soldier by the looks of him, calls. He hops out of the front cab as the three walkers begin rounding the back corner of the truck to reach him. Tara hops over the hatch before turning to Nell and offering her her hand.   
Nell promptly ignores the gesture and instead braces her hand on the latch and vaults over it herself - biting back a curse at the searing pain it sends through her side. When the pair finally round the side of the truck, they find that only one of the three walkers remains.   
The soldier somehow managed to put his crowbar through the last walker's jaw and pin it to the side of the truck. He spots the two women and nods to the rifle in Tara’s hands. “Can I borrow that a sec?” Tara tosses him the rifle easily, making the large man grin. He quickly smashes the stock of the gun against the walkers head, smashing it, before he tosses it back to Tara.   
“There are some rags in the back.” He states so Tara can clean the rifle. Tara simply stares at the man.   
“What?”   
“Never seen that before.”   
He raises his shoulders slightly, waving a hand towards Nell. “Seen you do the same thing to protect your girl there.”  
“You smiled. You were smiling.” Tara finally explains, shifting her weight.  
“Well,” The soldier grins after a beat, “I’m the luckiest guy in the world.” He turns and nods up ahead to the cars blocking the road, “How about you two help with one of these cars? We got some miles to go.” 

~~~

“Hey don’t move.” Nell blinks her eyes open, finding Tara holding out a bottle of water to Glenn. “Here’s some water.” It takes the blonde a few beats to process the information that Glenn has woken up over all of the aches in her body. Though when she does, Nell quickly maneuvers beside him and in front of Tara.   
“Where are we?” Glenn croaks out, the confusion clear as day on his face.   
“I don’t know.” Tara and Nell speak at the same time. Making them glance at one another before Nell nods for Tara to continue. “We were fighting biters and you passed out right after we left the prison. I didn’t know what to do… The back of a truck seemed safer than the side of the road.”  
“We didn’t have much choice,” Nell states, nodding again to Tara before focusing on her friend. As he shakingly gets to his knees to try standing up. Both Tara and Nell try to keep him steady.   
“Hey, hey, hey.” Nell grips onto Glenn's arm, but he cuts her off.  
“Did we pass the bus?” He asks, before looking at Tara. “Did we pass a bus on the side of the road?”   
“We did?” Nell quickly asks when the other woman nods.   
“You fell asleep not long after you rebandaged your side and-” She tries to explain but Glenn quickly cuts her off with his own question.   
“What did you see? What did you see?” Glenn repeats himself, almost sounding frantic and Nell can feel a stone forming in her own stomach.   
“They … They were all dead.”   
Nell grasps the back of the cab to keep herself steady. Why did I let myself fall asleep. Dammit!   
“How long ago did we pass it?” Glenn asks sharply, his tone causing Nell to refocus on the other two again.   
“Three hours.”   
At her answer, Glenn glances at Nell before he turns and slams his hands against the cab window. “Hey. Hey, stop the truck!” They all begin hitting the back of the truck when the soldier flips them off through the window.   
“Hey, numbnuts!” Tara yells, “Stop the truck!”   
Nell shifts backward when she spots Glenn grab his rifle. Quickly getting out of his way as he slams the stock against the cab window. Continuing to demand they stop the truck.  
When the truck finally begins to slow, Nell quickly grabs her pack and pulls it on. Then her recurve bow, keeping it over only one shoulder for quick access. Once the truck is completely stopped, the trio drop the hatch and hop out of the truck. Glenn pulls his own backpack on before leading the two women back down the road in the direction they came from.   
“Where the hell are you going?” The soldier calls as he and his friends round the truck. When no one answers, he continues. “I don’t know what your lady friends told you about the special nature of the mission we're on, but this shit is time sensitive and we’re already way behind schedule.”   
The soldier quickly jogs to catch up with the trio and gets in front of Glenn. “So I need you to turn your ass around and get back into the truck.”   
“I gotta go.” Is all Glenn offers, trying to step around the other man - only for him to follow.  
“Y’know, it seems like none of ya been paying close enough attention to the hell on earth we’ve been living in.” The man starts, shaking his head, “So, let me tell ya how to best avoid becoming just another dead-alive prick.”  
“You find some strong, like-minded comrades and you stay stuck together like wet on water. We need people. The more the better. We’re gonna need each other, partner. Even with all that gear on your shoulder, you won’t last a night. Not by yourself.”   
“He isn’t alone.” Nell states sharply, taking a step forward and squaring her shoulders as her hand subconsciously finds her bow - ready to pull it loose. When Glenn goes to step past again, the soldier pushes him back.  
“I’m gonna have to insist that you hold the hell up.” Nell lets her bow slip off her shoulder the instant she hears the soldier's tone of voice, an arrow notched and ready - but not drawn. From the corner of her eye, she can see that Tara is gripping the pistol on her belt - and she knows for a fact that the woman with the soldier has done the exact same behind them.   
“Believe it or not.” The soldier begins, leaning closer to Gleen. “The fate of the entire damn human race might depend on it.”  
The pair stay still before Glenn finally takes a step back and forces the other man's hand away with a harsh push. “What the hell are you talking about?” He glances at Nell and Tara. “Who is this guy?”  
“I am sergeant Abraham Ford.” The soldier, Abraham, states before nodding to his friends. “And these are my companions. Rosita Espinosa and Dr. Eugene Porter. We are on a mission to get Eugene to Washington D.C. Eugene’s a scientist, and he knows exactly what caused this mess.”   
Nell glances around at the three somewhat strangers before shifting her attention back to Glenn. “Alright then, what the hell happened?”  
“It’s classified.” Eugene, the doctor, states.   
“He’d been talking to the muckety-mucks in Washington on his satellite phone.” Abraham speaks up, “The past couple weeks, nobody’s been picking up on the other end. We saw how you handled those corpses back there. We could use your help.”   
Glenn and Nell share a long, silent look before Glenn shakes his head. “Sorry.” Again, he, Nell and Tara begin walking in the direction of the bus. Nell slips her arrow back into the quiver attached to her backpack with one last glance over her shoulder and rests her bow on her shoulder again. She keeps walking.   
“We had to get off that road,” Tara explains to Glenn as Nell catches up to the pair - moving to walk between them. Glenn to her right and Tara, to her left.   
“She’s right.” Nell nods, “We had no choice.”  
“You were passed out, we were out of bullets.” Tara continues. “I know how to get back to the bus. I wrote down every turn -” She shows her arm, where she wrote down the directions. “- I will get you both back if I can, okay?”  
“That’s where she’d go to find me.” Glenn states and Nell nods. She knows that her sister will be looking for them both - along with Beth if she isn’t already with Maggie. “That’s where we gotta go.”  
“It’s a waste of time,” Abraham calls, keeping a few paces behind the trio. “Tara told us what went down. There is zero chance you will ever find your wife again. Alive or dead. Mainly because, sorry to tell you, she’s gone.”  
“No need for y’all to die too.”  
Nell stops just before Glenn and Tara, turning sharply to face the sergeant. “That is my little sister you are talking about, Sergeant. You’ve got no idea how strong she is. Maggie is alive.”  
“Now, come on.” Abraham sighs, shaking his head at the shorter woman. “Sweetheart, get back in the truck. Do something with your life. When the people we … we love kick… well, they disappear. Doesn’t mean you gotta go out that way too.”  
Nell didn’t even hear Glenn drop his pack. All she sees is the taller man fall backward from the hard hook Glenn clocked him with. “She is alive, and we are going to find her.”  
Nell is moving before she has even completely thought the action through - placing herself between Glenn and Abraham in a quick step when the man charges. She shifts her left foot back and grabs her wrist as she rams her shoulder into the soldier's chest - stopping him in his tracks.   
“Get the hell outta my way, girl!” The man tries to shove Nell to the side, but she catches his wrist and twists it around, pushing him backward.   
“You do not touch my family.” She states it sharply, holding Abraham's glare unflinchingly. Rosita and Tara have both moved closer, ready to step in. She can sense that Glenn is right behind her.  
“I am not gonna warn you again, girl.” Abraham snaps, trying to push past her again.   
“And, I will not warn you again.” Nell all but growls, placing a hand firmly on the larger man's chest and pushing him back a step. “No one touches my family.”  
Abraham finally snaps, grabbing Nell and shoving her back, it makes the woman stumble backward into Tara. Abraham rushes Glenn and tackles him to the ground. Tara tries to help Nell regain her balance, but she’s already shifted her weight to run at Abraham. Rosita and Tara both race after her.   
Gunshots.   
It makes everything freeze. All of them stopping and looking back to the truck. Walkers have begun walking out of the cornfields surrounding them and Eugene has one of the rifles in his hand. Shooting one of the walkers before accidentally shooting the truck itself.  
“Eugene!” Abraham yells, jogging towards the doctor and waving his hands to try and stop him. “Stop firing! Stop firing! We need to get our weapons!”  
The group quickly scramble back to the truck as Eugene manages to turn his aim towards the field and the walkers. Eleanor has already notched her second arrow by the time the others have reached the truck. Her first arrow already buried in the skull of one of the fallen walkers.   
Together, the group of six takes down the small horde that had been in the field. A few long, tense moments of silence following as they wait to see if more will come. When none do, they all make their way back to the truck. Though Nell takes an extra few moments to scan the corn stalks before she begins collecting her arrows. Wiping them down with the hem of her t-shirt. 

~~~

“We ran a convoy in one of these,” Abraham states from under the gas tank of the truck. “Coming up a dune, there’s this camel, looks like it’s about to puke. Probably because shitbirds packed about four pounds of C4 up its ass. We were about twenty feet from that blast and it sent that animals hump half klick into the desert, and we drove home.”  
“So,” Abraham slowly pulls himself out from under the tank and looks at Eugene. “So, you tell me, how in the holy hell did you possibly kill this truck?”  
Everyone turns their gaze to the doctor. “A fully amped up state and an ignorance of rapid-firing weapons.”  
Nell has to shake her head in disbelief. “We live in a world where the dead are up and walking, and you don’t know how to shoot a goddamn gun?”  
“Says the woman who chooses to use a primitive weapon.” Eugene says, turning his gaze to Nell.   
“He’s kinda got a point.” Tara shrugs, looking over her shoulder to the other woman - who has perched herself up on the side of the truck.   
“Whose side are you on?”  
Glenn walks between the two, tucking something back into his pocket before handing Abraham back his rifle. “Sorry about your ride.” He says, and the two men share a look before he continues. “I hope you guys make it to Washington.”  
Eleanor easily hops off the truck wall and falls into step beside her friend. “Wait for me.” Tara calls, jogging to catch up with the pair. Nell would never admit it, but she almost smiles at the other woman's antics. She does laugh however when she hears the other three begin following them down the road.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading chapter two! Let me know what you think in the comments!


	3. Episode Three ~ Us (S4:E15)

Leaning back against the tree, Nell can almost find it in herself to sleep. The crickets chirping and the night sky clear and soft, it’s hard not to just close her eyes.   
“Get some sleep, I got this.” Tara mutters softly, sitting down next to the blonde and leaning back on the tree.   
“Says the one who hasn’t slept since the prison.” Nell has to fight a yawn as she sits up and stretches her arms - wincing when the bandages over her ribs pull upward over her burns. “If anyone needs sleep, it’s you.”  
“I agree with ya,” Abraham states as he paces up the slight hill and drops to sit down on Nell’s other side. “But, she’s got a point too. With how scuffed up you are.”  
Nell turns her head, trying to stifle another yawn. “You done with your little patrol already, Sergeant?” Nell stands then, shuffling down the slope towards the train tracks.  
“Leaving so soon, girlie?” Abraham calls after her.  
Nell raises her middle finger over her shoulder as she steps onto the tracks, pointedly not responding to the man. It takes her only a few beats to decide on a spot and sit down. She tosses her pack against one rail and leans back on it as a makeshift pillow before lifting her legs and resting them on the opposing rail.  
Eleanor can finally relax - but for whatever reason, her eyes just won’t shut. So, she simply stares down the tracks. Wondering if a train might come barreling down towards them sometime during the night.   
“You can go to sleep.” Tara states quietly. Her voice barely reaches Nell's ears, but it catches her attention anyway as she shifts her eyes to the starry sky.   
“No offense,” Abraham starts, his voice nowhere near as soft. “But I’m not leaving Eugene’s life in your hands.”  
“You came with us because you wanted help.” Tara huffs out.  
“You’re support, not point.” Abraham states. “We’ll move north with you until I find the right vehicle just on the tracks. Then six becomes three.”   
“Or two.” Tara whispers. It causes their conversation to fall silent for a beat or two.   
“We each have our missions.” Abraham finally says, and Nell is suddenly stuck with the realization she shouldn't be listening - eavesdropping -.   
“You need to get some sleep.” The soldier says eventually, breaking the second wave of silence. “I haven’t seen you do it yet… I thought it was because you were in love with him.”  
“A girl in love with a guy she’s trying to help get to his girl. If that were the case… closing your eyes would be just too damn tragic.”  
“If that were the case.” Tara cuts in quietly.  
“I saw the way you were looking down Rosita’s shirt while she was serving you dinner. Hey, the things are damn near hypnotic.” Nell can imagine the man raising his hands in peace at this as he laughs dryly. He trails off then, possibly in thought, or more likely, in Nell’s opinion, thinking of the topic at hand. She tries to block out said thoughts as she forces her eyes to shut.   
“Seen how your eyes follow that damn archer, too.” He adds finally, like an afterthought as he continues. “Look, Eugene spends half the day staring at her ass. I’m not mad, it just means my theory’s shot.”  
“I’m awfully sorry about that.” Tara snarks.  
“Well, I’m right and I’m wrong... something you did or something you didn’t do?” The crickets are the only sounds filling the long pause that follows Abrahams's question.   
“Something I did.” Nell just barely hears the other woman's answer. Maybe she’ll regret it, but all she can think to do now is listen more. “You were in the army.”  
Tara seems to think for a moment. “I get the whole gung ho, the mission is your life bullshit.”  
“Yeah, you do…”  
“Yeah. So, we both got our reasons. Both got our missions… what do you do when the mission’s over?”   
No answer follows, and a small stone seems to settle at the pit of Eleanor’s stomach as she waits. She waits until the sun rises just high enough to break through the tree branches before she finally allows herself to shift from the curled ball she had maneuvered into sometime during the night. And she goes on like she never heard a word as the group begins to move once more. 

~~~

“Been rubbing me wrong, is all.” Eugene says, keeping pace with Tara as the group continues down the tracks. “I’m an even Steven type gentleman, you help me find supplies, we’ll share the battery and whatever jucy we scare up, minimal as it may be. Deal?”  
Nell can only assume the doctor is talking about the homemade battery he had told Tara about the day before. Though, Nell only watches as Tara either ignores or doesn’t hear the question. Her attention instead is drawn to whatever is ahead of them, the brunette nearly jogs forward with a sign.   
‘Salvation for all. Community for all. Those who arrive Survive.’ is written in black paint on a board just above a map of the railroad tracks. ‘Glenn go to Terminus Maggie Sasha Bob.’ is written in what looks like walker blood just underneath the map. On the map itself, it shows all of the tracks coming together at a center star. At Terminus.   
It takes a moment for it to process in Nell’s head. Maggie wrote this. It isn’t really until Glenn sprints past her that she finally reacts. Rushing after her brother-in-law, Nell can’t stop the smile from pulling at her lips.   
They go like this until they can’t any longer. The others finally convincing the pair to at least slow to a brisk walk so that they can all keep together. Within a few hours, Abraham finally calls them all to a stop.  
“We’re stopping here.” The soldier declares. Rosita, Eugene, and Tara all quickly follow his lead as they walk toward the town along the side of the tracks. “Tired is slow. Slow is dead.”  
“It’s barely noon.” Glenn states, glancing at the sky before looking back to the soldier.   
“I don’t give a monkey's left nut. None of us has slept more than a couple of hours straight since we went all Casey Jones. This place looks safe. We need to rest.” Abraham tries to explain, and Nell has to agree when she takes notice of everyone's exhausted expressions.   
“I get it.” The soldier says, waving a hand toward Eugene “You have to find her. But Rosita and me, we got a mission, too. It’s keeping that man alive, getting to Washington, and saving the whole damn world. So we’re going in that tower and we’re going now.”  
As if on cue, shit hits the fan. Before Nell can even process what’s happening, Abraham is yelling and running forward. He protectively shoves Eugene, forcing him to stumble backward into Tara - who falls hard on her leg as a walker flies down from one of the upper floors of the tower.   
“Are you okay?” Rosia asks as Tara clutches her knee.  
“I’m fine.” She snaps and Nell quickly moves over to the brunette.   
“Let me see.” Nell doesn't really think about what she is doing. She raises her hands when Tara shoves them away from her. “Tara, my dad was our doctor. I helped him constantly, I can help.”  
“No, Eleanor. I’m fine.” Tara forces herself onto her feet. Nell hovers beside her for a beat before taking a step back.   
“You wanna stop or keep going?” Glenn asks, stepping towards the two.   
“Keep going.” Tara waves a hand. “I’m good, I’m good.”  
“If she can keep going, we all can keep going.” He says to the rest of them as he turns to face the group.   
“Tara, you don’t-”  
“I said I’m fine.” Tara cuts Nell off, making the other woman take another step back as she limps past her.  
“Or, you guys can stay here.” Glenn says, looking to Abraham. “You don’t need us, we don’t need you. It’s okay.”  
“Wow, you’re an ass.” Rosita snaps, catching everyone’s attention. “She will do whatever you say because she thinks she owes you. Man up. Stay here for a few hours.”  
Glenn simply ignores the woman, stepping to Abraham. “You just care about keeping Eugene safe, right? It’s the only reason you wanna stop? We go until sundown, I give Eugene my riot gear right here, right now. Everyone wins.”  
“Except her,” Rosita states, pointing to Tara - who just bows her head at the attention.   
“Glenn, she’s right -” Nell starts, but she gets cut off by Abraham.  
“You’re not her moma.” He pointedly says to Rosita before turning his eyes to Tara. “She says she can walk, she can walk. You got yourself a deal.”

~~~

They continue along the tracks until they finally come to a tunnel. More signs are posted around the outer wall. Glenn jogs forward to touch the blood and grins. “We’re gaining on ‘em. Still wet.”  
“Sure as Shinola can’t go up and over.” Abraham calls as they all gather around the mouth of the tunnel. Inside the echoing groans of walkers bounce off the walls and back to them.   
“How about around?”   
“No.” Glenn shakes his head, looking around them. “That’ll take a day, maybe more. If Maggie went through, I’m going through. We’re close.”   
“You hear that?” Abraham asks, shaking his head as he points to the tunnel. “That there is a long, dark tunnel full of reanimated corpses. I don’t have full loin certainty that I can get Eugene through there alive. My recommendation would be take the day, make the detour and play it safe, but uh, I know you two aren’t gonna do that. So this is where we gotta part ways. I’m sorry, you’re on your own.”   
“No, they’re not.” Tara states, stepping forward to stand beside Eleanor.   
“Tara, you don’t owe-” Nell starts.  
“I do.”  
Abraham riffles through his pack for a moment before pulling out two cans of food and holds them up to Glenn, who tries to refuse. “You guys need it for your trip.”  
“You will, too.” When Glenn doesn’t take the cans, Tara hobbles forward and takes them, nodding to the soldier. Nell shrugs off her bag and waves Tara to pass them to her to store.  
“Thank you.” It’s all Glenn can manage before Abraham hands him a heavy army flashlight as well.  
“Sorry I, ah… hit you in the face.” Glenn apologies and Abraham laughs.  
“I’m not. I like to fight.” The two men share a smile at this.   
Rosita steps forward then and raises an arm to hug Glenn. “Good luck. Try not to be an ass.” She then moves to hug Tara before then hugging Eleanor. “And you, don’t let him be an ass, you’re his sister-in-law. He needs your approval.” Nell chuckles and nods.  
“You’re all, um, good people.” Eugene begins, and the trio turn their attention to him. “I have to say, you are seriously hot, Tara.” Nell shakes her head as Tara sighs.   
“Yeah, I like girls.”   
“I’m well aware of that.” Tara tries not to smile as she turns to face the tunnel, Nell elbows Glenn when he fails to hide his laughter.   
“Stay out of trouble in there.” Abraham calls, “You turn around. We’re doubling back to the first road we crossed. Maybe you find us before we find the right ride.”  
“Thanks.” Nell nods to the soldier as he starts back down the tracks, Rosita and Eugene following after him.   
“Hey,” Glenn steps closer to Tara, “I know what you’re going through.” The two share a look before Tara limps forward into the tunnel. Nell can’t stop herself from looking at the sky one last time before following the other two. “After all this started, after I realized I’d never see my family, my friends again, I was numb. All day long, just numb. I’m just, I’m just saying I get it.”  
The trio walk in silence for a few long moments after Glenn’s words before Tara speaks up. “When Brian told us he wanted to take the prison, I knew it sounded bad.” She says slowly, Glenn and Nell on either side of her as they walk. “When I found my girlfriend, she was dead. My niece. My sister, she was surrounded, pounced on. I saw it happen. Still, it wasn’t as bad as seeing what he did to your father, Nell.”  
At this, they all stop and Tara turns to look at Eleanor, tears behind her eyes, her voice trembling. “Because that’s when I knew. That the second the sword - I wanted to scream ‘no’ but it just happened. Brian said we might have to kill people. I was the first to jump in… I was just hanging on the ‘might’.”  
Tara finally finishes and she turns forward, continuing down the dark tunnel. Glenn recovers quick enough. But it takes Nell a few long moments to finally allow herself to breathe again. It only takes a few long strides to catch up again, but she stays a step behind the pair as they walk.   
It isn’t until they reach a cave-in that Nell moves beside them again. Glenn’s flashlight shines on the many dead trapped under it. “Jesus.” Nell mutters the sheer sight of it all causing her to take a step back.   
“The blood is still wet,” Tara states, as they move around to get a closer look. “This happened today.”   
Glenn takes a moment to study the ruble before he hands Nell the flashlight. He secures his rifle and pulls out his knife then. Nell follows his lead, pulling out her own as the trio carefully climb up the debris. They kill any walker within reach of them.   
As they get to the top and Glenn takes the flashlight back and shines the light down the tunnel, multiple walkers all turn to the sudden light. “Glenn, what are you doing?” Tara asks, crouched down against the tunnel wall. Nell has taken a knee next to her.   
“She’s not one of them.”  
“What?”  
“There’s no bodies on the ground either. That means Maggie made it through.” At this, Nell moves forward to get a better look.   
“We have to get rid of them.” Glenn states.  
“We don’t have enough ammo,” Tara replies quietly.  
“Then we’ll push through.”  
“Glenn,” Nell takes his arm as she shakes her head. “We have to find another way through. There are too many of them, we can’t run with Tara’s leg in the condition it’s in.” For a while, the trio quietly debates on a plan. Maybe for thirty minutes before they have one formed. Placing the flashlight on the opposite corner would draw the walkers there and give the trio enough time to sneak past.  
And it goes well, up until it doesn’t. Glenn had gone first, Tara right after so that Nell and him could cover her. But when the brunette steps on the wrong piece of stone and it gives way, it manages to pin Tara’s leg. She can’t stop her own pained and startled yelp from catching not only Nell and Glenn's attention but also some of the closer walkers.   
“Shit!” Nell and Glenn both try to grab the slab of stone, pulling as hard as they can against it. It won’t budge. “I can’t-”  
“You can.” Nell snaps back at the other woman, before her hand slips and she falls backward into the rubble.   
“Are you -?” Glenn turns to her to offer help, but the blonde is already back up.   
“Dammit!” She quickly moves to grab the stone again, but Tara catches her now scraped and bloody hands.   
“Stop it.” She pants, both of them look at her as she continues. “Go, go find Maggie. Go find Maggie.”  
“No, no.” Nell shakes her head, trying to grab the stone but Tara stops her again. Glenn pausing as she does. “You can’t save me. Even if you got this off me, I can’t run. And if you help me, they’re gonna get us all.”  
“There’s gotta be a way.” Glenn shakes his head as he and Nell both grab the stone. “There’s gotta be a different way.”  
“Their coming.” Tara warns, lightly pushing the two away from her.   
“We aren’t leaving you.” Nell tries.  
Tara grabs her shirt and shoves her away. “Get out of here!” She screams, catching them all off guard. “Go!”  
“No.” Glenn turns to the walkers, quickly aiming his pistol and opening fire. Nell follows his lead and slips her bow off her shoulder. Swiftly notching arrow after arrow. They keep going until Nell runs out of arrows and Glenn’s pistol jams. They both ready themselves to fight.  
Everyone is suddenly blinded by headlights. But they all react as soon as they hear Abraham yelling for them to get down. Nell wraps an arm around Tara’s shoulders and grabs Glenn by the back of his collar, yanking him down to them. She wraps her free arm around his chest. The tunnel fills with the deafening sound of weapon fire. They all stay frozen several long seconds after the eternity that it rang out ends. It’s not until Glenn shifts that any of them dare to move.   
Glenn pulls away completely and glances at the two women behind him. It only takes a few small nods for him to turn back to the headlights. Nell doesn’t leave her spot, awkwardly kneeling beside Tara. Still too shocked by the sight of her sister hugging her husband and the joyful mix of sobs and laughter that follows their embrace.   
It is not until they’ve had their moment that Tara pushes her softly back that Nell snaps out of it. Glancing at the brunette beside her, Nell hesitates. “Go. Go hug your sister, I’m fine.” Nell doesn’t need to be told twice as she quickly - albeit, clumsily - stumbles over the rubble to meet her sister halfway in a bear hug. When she pulls back, she takes her sister's face in her hands and studies her - checking for any scrapes or bruises - her own bloody hands smearing a bit of blood on her cheeks.   
“What happened to you?” Maggie asks and despite the grin on her face, the concern in her voice is clear to Nell.   
“It doesn’t matter now.”

~~~

“How am I gonna explain that I was with the group that -?” Tara worries her lip between her teeth as she paces at the mouth of the tunnel.   
“You weren’t,” Nell states, catching the brunette's arm to stop her pacing. “Tara, you are a good person, what happened before, it doesn’t matter, okay?”   
“You wanna lie to your sister?”   
“I’m not lying.” Nell shakes her head, “You saved Glenn and my life and you are a part of this group. I know that Glenn knows it. Maggie will too. What happened before doesn’t matter right now.”  
Nell carefully steadies her gaze on the other woman, trying to show how sincere she is about what she has said. Tara looks like she’s about to say something but doesn’t get the chance as Rosita walks over.  
“Got the sound traps up, should be good to head back.” She explains, stepping past them. They walk back is silent until they run into Glenn and Maggie just a few yards before the rest of the group. “How’d it go?” Glenn asks and Rosita easily fills him in.  
Maggie steps closer and smiles at Tara. “We didn’t get to officially meet.”   
“Oh-” Nell begins.  
“Tara, this is Maggie. Maggie, Tara.” Glenn cuts in before she can finish her thought.  
“Hi.” Tara tries to smile, but she can barely hold Maggie's gaze. “He’s a big fan of yours.”  
Everyone chuckles at this. “Um, we meant Tara on the road.” Glenn explains.   
“We couldn’t have made it here without her.” Nell adds and Tara looks at her. They share a smile before Maggie steps forward and wraps her arms around Tara in a hug.   
“Thank you.”  
“She heard what we were doing and said she had to help us.” Glenn states, before nodding to himself a little and adding, “She’s just that kind of person.”  
When they reach the rest of the group, Sasha is standing and pointing at Eugene. “He just said he knows what caused the outbreak.”   
“He does.” Glenn nods. “Let me guess, he asked you to go to DC with him?” He asks, glancing at Abraham as the man speaks up.  
“I’m down right tickled y’all found each other. Should spend the rest of the night celebrating. Because tomorrow there’s absolutely no reason why the nine of us don’t stuff ourselves in that van and head up to Washington.”  
“He’s right.” Tara states with a nod, glancing over to Glenn and Nell as she adds, “I’m gonna go.”   
“No, he’s wrong.” Eugene cuts in, causing everyone to look at him. “We’re fifty-five percent of the way from Houston to Washington. Up until now, we’ve had an armored military vehicle for transport and we lost eight people.”  
“That wasn’t our fault.” Rosita snaps just as Abraham states that they’re gone.   
“I can’t imagine we’d have better luck with that grocery grabber we picked up. We’re a day's walk from Terminus, who knows what they’ve got there.”  
“Look, it couldn’t hurt to check.” Rosita agrees, “Load up on supplies, maybe even recruit some of them to come with.”  
“I’ll come with you guys, but only after.” Sasha states, “I have to see Terminus. My brother could be there. I gotta know.”   
“I’m with Sasha.” Nell nods, glancing at Maggie and Glenn. “We still need to find Beth. She’s still out there, maybe at that place… we have to find her.”  
“He tells me I’m wrong…” Abraham slowly stands and looks at Eugene. “I listen. Tomorrow we go to the end of the line. Then Washington.”   
Everyone gathered around the fire seems to silently agree with this. And for the next hour or so, they chat and eat. Catching up with one another and sharing stories around the small camp they have set up for the night.   
Finally feeling lighter - surrounded by soft conversation and quiet laughter - Nell pulls out her notebook for the first time since the prison fell. She takes note of finding Maggie and the group that they have found themselves with. She writes about the tunnel and the genuine fear she felt when Tara’s leg got pinned.   
Even with the past they share, she does not hold anger towards the other woman. Even with the bloodshed. And before she really knows she is doing it, Nell has a small sketch drawn of the brunette. It catches her off guard when she realizes the attention to detail. She had managed to spot Tara mid-laugh across the fire pit - laughing at something Glenn said. And she had to draw it at the bottom of the page.  
So she did. Flipping back, Nell glances over the other drawings she has done. Those of Maggie and Beth. Carl playing with Judith. Sasha chatting with Bob. Those of her father. An old sketch of her family - a copy of a photo that had hung in her room at the prison.  
She closes the cover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Thanks for reading this chapter! Please, let me know what you think in the comments! Feedback is a must-have! If I can improve I want to and hearing from y'all really helps me do that! Thanks again!


	4. Episode Four ~ No Sanctuary (S4:E16)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've realized I forgot to add in trigger warnings for chapters so I will be adding those now.   
> Also thank you for sticking around and checking this out, I really appreciate y'all. 
> 
> Trigger Warning: Violence, blood, gore, cursing, not so comfy situations (there is suggested attempted sexual assault but it doesn't happen and isn't heavily described. Just hinted at.)

They’d finally made it to Terminus. The place looked so calm from the fences, it was almost hard for Eleanor to comprehend it all. There were gardens and rows upon rows of planted veggies. The group knew to be careful, they had to be with the world they live in, it was still hard to be on edge in such a beautiful place.  
It wasn’t until they walked through the final gate that Nell really began to question the place. It all seemed too perfect. Almost untouched from the outside world. As they walked further in, a woman by a grill quickly turns to greet them with a broad smile.   
“Hi, I’m Mary.” She introduces herself, her eyes skimming over everyone. “Looks like you’ve been on the road a while.”  
“We have.” Maggie nods, Nell shifts a step closer to her sister.  
“Let’s get you settled and we’ll make you a plate.” Mary says, “Welcome to Terminus.”

~~~

They all hear the ringing of gunshots at the same time. Each shot echoes through the train yard. Everyone moves to one end of the train car, the opposite end to the way the door slides open. And they wait, they wait for what feels like an eternity it seems like. Before the gunshots end and Nell can hear the man who caged them, Gareth, yelling outside.  
It isn’t until the door opens and shuts again with four new people entering that anyone moves. “Rick?” Glenn asks, and everyone slowly moves forward to see the four who’ve joined them.  
“You’re here… you’re here.” Rick states, studying everyone as the group comes together at the center of the car. But his soft gaze hardens when it lands on Tara. Nell knows he recognizes her from the prison.   
“They’re our friends.” Maggie states, nodding to Tara, Abraham, Rosita, and Eugene.   
“They helped us.” Nell adds, taking a small step forward to shift slightly in front of Tara, almost subconsciously, to act as a buffer from Rick's harsh stare.   
“Yeah.” Daryl nods, eyeing everyone before he continues. “Now they’re friends of ours.”  
“For however long that’ll be.” Abraham huffs and turns away.  
“No.” Rick says simply, shaking his head before stepping closer to the door. “They’re gonna feel pretty stupid when they find out.”  
“Find out what?” Abraham raises a brow.  
Rick turns to him. “They’re screwing with the wrong people.”

~~~

“Black car with a white cross painted on it.” Daryl explains to the Greene sisters as the group works on their makeshift weapons. “I tried to follow it. I tried.”  
“But she’s alive?” Nell asks the man, glancing up from tearing the zipper of her jacket away from the cloth itself.   
“She’s alive.”  
It somehow feels like both an eternity and only a few more seconds when Daryl warns the group of four incoming enemies.   
“You know what to do.” Rick says as everyone moves to flank either side of the train car door, their makeshift weapons in hand. “Go for their eyes first. Then their throats.”  
“Put your backs to the walls on either side of the car now.” A man outside orders and everyone seems to give one last glance to one another before they ready themselves for the upcoming fight.   
Nell wraps her jacket zipper carefully around her knuckles, and she waits. It isn't until the hatch on the roof opens and a military-grade smoke bomb is dropped in that all hell breaks loose. “Move!”  
Honestly, Nell doesn’t quite know how to process the following events. All she knows is that she is temporarily blinded by the flash and the smoke. And then arms are wrapped around her. Pain shoots through her ribs as she is yanked backward. Nell twists wildly and slams her elbow back into whoever is is clutching her and trying to drag her backward.   
When Eleanor turns and finds the man - presumably the same one who grabbed her before - charging at her again, she doesn’t think before her fist connects with his masked face. She can feel the metal teeth digging into her knuckles, but she doesn’t let herself be distracted by it. Nell lunges forward, meeting the man halfway, and manages to shove him into the wall.   
She doesn’t know how many times she reels her fist back, or for how long she manages to keep the man pinned by the throat. All she knows is that she is going to do as much damage as she can, while she can. Eleanor doesn’t really process the second set of arms wrapped around her until she feels her feet leaving the ground.   
For a split second, Nell is airborne and nothing makes sense.   
Then her spine and the back of her skull slams into the gravely ground of the train tracks. The daylight is blinding - blinding to the point she doesn’t see, but more hears, the other bodies hitting the ground beside her.   
The pain in her side and at the back of her head doesn’t help her any. Trying to push herself onto her knees, Nell cries out as a boot connects with her ribs. Slamming right into the burns she sustained from the prison explosion. Then her eyes are in the sky again.   
She can’t breathe. And it doesn’t make sense until she recognizes there is a heavy weight on her abdomen. A rough hand grabs her wrists, retching them above her head. “Too bad you’re all scraped up like this, darling, you really are quite a beauty.” The man’s other hand pulls Nell's choppy hair, forcing her to look up at him.   
Nell meets the man’s eyes, watching as a sick grin twists across his lips. He let’s go of her hair long enough to run a calloused hand across her cheek and harshly rub his thumb over her bottom lip.   
Nell doesn’t think before her jaw is locked around the man's finger. Blood coats her tongue and Nell hears the pop as her teeth dislocate the thumb from the knuckle. “Fuck!” A hand slams to her throat, crushing her windpipe.   
“You fucking bitch!” As soon as the man has his hand back, he stands and slams his boot into the side of Nell’s face. She can already feel blood coating her chin and cheek from the blow.   
“Lenny!” Another man grabs the one who had been on top of her - Lenny - and pulls him back as Lenny clutches his hand. “We have the four we want. You can have your revenge later.”  
Nell doesn’t know who grabs her then, but suddenly she’s on her feet and being shoved back into the train car. She lands on her hands and knees, spitting out a mix of her own blood and Lenny’s.   
“Nellie!” The blonde flinches as her sister grabs her arms, meaning to help her up. Maggie shifts away when she sees the fear on her face. “Nellie, it’s me.” When she reaches out her hands, slower this time, Nell accepts the touch.   
“I’m sorry - I just, just dizzy.” Her hand touches the gash on her chin a little too roughly, making her clench her jaw shut. “Who did they take?” She asks, finally getting back to her feet and gripping her sister's hand.  
“My dad, Glenn, Daryl, and Bob.” Carl says, glancing at the blonde before back to the floor. And everything falls quiet. Like no one knows what to say or do. Then gunshots rage outside, making everyone flinch. An explosion shakes the train car.   
“What the hell is going on?” Abraham slams his hand against the door at the question, not sparing a glance to the others.   
“Maybe our people go free.” Sasha suggests.   
“Someone hit ‘em.” Michonne adds.  
Nell moves closer to the door, trying to see out the crack between the door and the wall. Everyone seems to follow her, wanting to know what’s happening even if they don’t look. Eugene is the only one not paying attention, his focus instead on something at the bottom of the door.  
“Hey,” Carl calls, making everyone look at the boy. “My dad’s gonna be back. They all are.”  
“They are.” Maggie agrees, coming to stand beside the young Grimes. “And we need to get ready to fight our way out with them when they do.”  
Everyone seems to silently agree, all going back to making adjusting their makeshift weapons. Nell comes to stand beside Michonne at the door. “See anything yet?”   
The swordswoman glances at her, “Walkers.” Nell nods and readjusts the zipper around her now bloody and raw knuckles.   
“What’s the cure, Eugene?” Sasha finally asks after everyone’s become absorbed in their work.  
“That’s classified.” The doctor states simply, and everyone turns their attention to the pair.  
“We don’t know what’s gonna happen.” Michonne states, eyeing the man.  
“You leave him be.” Abraham cuts in harshly, not leaving room for anyone to say another more.   
“We need to keep working.” MMaggie says, trying to change the topic of conversion.   
“Yeah, but it’s time to hear it.” Sasha says, glancing at Maggie before back to the doctor. “Because we don’t know what’s next.”  
“What’s next is we get out of this.” Tara says, fidgeting with the makeshift weapon in her hands.   
“Even if I told you, even if I provided step by step instructions complete with illustrations and a well-composed FAQ and I went red-wing,” Eugene eventually speaks up. “The cure would still die with me.”  
“I’m not gonna let that happen.” Abraham states, giving the doctor a pointed look, though the doctor only continues.   
“The best care scenario we step out into a hell storm of bullets, fire, and walkers. I am not fleet of foot and I sure as hell can’t take a dead one down with sharp buttons and hella confidence.”   
“Yeah, but we can and we will.” Michonne says, tightening the cloth keeping the wooden spike tied to her sword sheath.   
“You don’t owe us anything. Not yet.” Sasha says, standing and staring down at the doctor. “But we just want to hear it.”  
“You don’t have to.” Rosita cuts in calmly.  
Eugene slowly stands. “I was part of a ten-person team at the Human Genome Project to weaponize diseases to fight weaponized diseases. Pathogenic microorganisms with pathogenic microorganisms. Fire with fire. Interdepartmental drinks were had, relationships made, information shared. I am keenly aware of all the details behind the fail-safe delivery system to kill every living person on this planet.”  
“I believe with a little tweaking on the terminals in DC, we can slip the script… take out every last dead one of them. Fire with fire. All things being equal, it does sound pretty badass.”  
“So,” Maggie begins, staring at the doctor a moment longer before glancing around at the others. “Let’s get back to work.”  
As if on cue, the train car door unlocks, and Rick yanks it open. “Come on!” He yells, already aiming his rifle again. “We fight to the fence!” Everyone rushes out, and Nell can’t stop the smile when she watches Carl barrels into his father for a hug.   
The group quickly rushes past the other train cars towards the clearing of the yard. Nell keeps pace in the back with Daryl, who has tossed her a machete. She takes down a walker that gets too close, carefully watching the rest of the group ahead of her as they finally make it through the chaos and to the bard-wired fence.   
“Up and over!” Rosita calls and Abraham quickly grabs an old disregarded rug, throwing it over top of the fence. Everyone jumps over the fence, Abraham offering a hand and following last. And the group runs. Rick and Daryl taking the lead. It feels like ages of this, of running. But why glancing at the sky, Nell guesses they only ran for a half-hour or so.   
“Right here.” Daryl states and kneels down, shifting his hand through the dead leaves on the ground before pulling out a camping shovel. He tosses it to Rick and the officer quickly begins digging.   
“The hell are we still around here for?” Abraham asks sharply as he moves towards the front of the group.  
“Guns, some supplies.” Rick states without looking up from his work. “Go along the fences. Use the rifles. Take out the rest of them.”  
“What?” Carl asks, and Nell moves forward to stand next to the kid.   
“They don’t get out alive.”  
“Rick, we got out.” Glenn states and Nell nods, adding on. “It’s over.”  
“It’s not over until they’re all dead.” Rick argues, pulling a blue duffle out of the ground and retrieving his revolver from it. He also pulls out a compound bow and tosses it to Nell - who easily catches it, noting the six arrows in the quiver.   
“The hell it isn’t.” Rosita snaps, throwing up a hand in the direction of Terminus. “The place is on fire. Full of walkers.”   
“I’m not dicking around with this crap.” Abraham states, shaking his head at the other man. “We just made it out.”  
“The fences are down. They’ll run or die.” Maggie says, nodding to Rick. Everyone falls quiet in the tension before the movement behind Rick catches Eleanor’s attention.  
“Carol?”  
At her name. Daryl glances back and breaks into a sprint. He doesn’t slow at all when he wraps his arms around the woman in a tight hug. Both of them quietly laughing as he lifts and spins her.   
After they break apart, Rick steps forward. “Did you do that?” When Carol tearfully nods, Rick hugs her.   
“You have to come with me.” She finally manages when the pair pull apart and no one argues as they follow the woman who saved them. When they finally come to a small little cabin, everyone seems to slow as Tyreese steps out of the door with little Judeth in his arms.  
Rick and Carl both drop their things and rush forward to meet the man, Sasha only a few steps behind them. Tyreese easily passes Judeth to her father and brother, meeting his sister halfway in a huge hug. Nell can only smile at the reunions, carefully bumping her shoulder into her sisters. Maggie grins, wrapping an arm around the woman’s waist as Eleanor’s easily falls around Maggie's shoulders.  
After mauve twenty minutes or so, Rick moves to the front of the group again. “I don’t know if the fire’s still burning.” Everyone looks to the smoke in the sky when he says it.  
“It is.” Carol informs him.  
“We need to go.”  
“Yeah, but where?” Daryl asks, causing Rick to glance around at the other man.  
“Somewhere far away from here.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading the chapter! Let me know what y'all think!


	5. Episode Five ~ Strangers (S5:E2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Violence, blood, gore, and cursing

As everyone settles for the night, Nell tries not to pay to close a mind to her thoughts and worries. She instead lets the weight of her new compound bow against her thigh comfort her as she focuses her attention on sharpening the knife in her hands. Letting the rhythm of it fill her ears, along with the sound of the crackling fire.  
Or that is until Tara plops down next to her with a loud thud and a dramatic sign as she eyes the fire. “You know what you’re doing, Nell?”  
“Probably better than you do.” Nell replies, causing the brunette to chuckle. “Saw Rick talking to ya.”   
“I think he likes me.” Tara nods, keeping her eyes on the fire in front of them.   
“He’s a good guy if a bit intimidating.” Nell shrugs, glancing at the woman beside her when she laughs.

~~~

The morning seemed to go by easily as the group moves through the woods. They only run into a few walkers here and there. Daryl even managed to get some squirrels with his crossbow. Everyone was going fine. And of course, that means it can’t last.   
When someone starts screaming for help, everyone freezes. No one moves for a moment, unsure of what to do. Carl though quickly begins moving in the direction of the screams. Telling his father they had to help if they could.   
The group quickly follows after the Grimes as they run towards whoever is screaming. After a minute or two of running, they make it to a large stone where a man in a priest’s outfit calls for help. A small group of walkers surrounds him, clawing and reaching for the man. It only takes Nell and Daryl two quick shots each to take out the walkers.  
“We’re clear. Keep watch.” Rick calls to the group before he turns to the priest. “Come down.”  
After the priest slips down, he shakingly looks around at the group. “Are you okay?” Rick asks, only for the man to double over and puke. Nell shakes her head at the sight, huffing a quiet laugh as wipes down her arrows. Though her laugh is cut short by Maggie's sharp elbow to the ribs.   
“Ow, what the hell, Maggs?” Nell rubs her side and looks to her sister, only to find her giving her a look, Nell relents with a sign.  
“Sorry.” The priest says quietly, looking around at the group before nodding. “Yes. Thank you. I’m Gabriel.”   
“Gabriel, do you have any weapons on you?” Rick asks.  
Gabriel chuckles before he notices Michonnes stare. “Do I look like I would have any weapons on me?”  
“We don’t give two short and curlies what it looks like.” Abraham states, making Nell give the man a look. “What, we don’t?”  
“Phrasing, dude. Phrasing.”  
“I have no weapons of any kind,” Gabriel states, drawing the blonde's attention back to him. “The word of God is the only protection I need.”  
“Sure didn’t look like it.” Daryl says, studying the priest.  
“I called for help. Help came.” Gabriel grins, but it’s nervous and unsure. “Do you have... Have any food? Whatever I, I had left, it just hit the ground.”   
“We got some pecans.” Carl shrugs, holding some out to the man.   
“Thank you.” He smiles, then his eyes finally land on Judeth who is in Tyreese’s arm. “That’s a beautiful child.”  
When no one reacts, Gabriel shifts uncomfortably. “Do you have a camp?”   
“No.” Nell states, taking a step closer, “Do you?”  
“I have a church.”  
“Hold your hands above your head.” Rick cuts in, and when the priest does as he is asked, Rick pats him down. “How many walkers have you killed?”  
“Not any, actually.”   
“How many people have you killed?”  
“None.”   
“Why?”  
“Because the Lord abhors violence.”  
“What have you done?” Rick finally asks, stepping close to the other man and continuing when he doesn’t respond. “We’ve all done something.”   
“I’m a sinner.” Gabriel finally says, “I sin almost every day. But those sins, I confess them to God, not strangers.”   
“You said you had a church?” Michone interrupts, and Gabriel quickly nods.   
With that, the priest leads the group back to his small church. The walk takes maybe a half-hour, and once they reach it, Gabriel heads up the steps.  
“Hold up.” Rick calls, making him turn back around. “Can we take a look around first?” Gabriel hands the man the keys to the building and Rick easily pushes the large door open. His rifle already raises as he steps inside. Nell stays outside and waits with the majority of the group as Rick, Daryl, Michonne, Carol, and Glenn all move in and clear the building.   
With her compound bow in hand, the blonde keeps one of her arrows notches. Just in case. She keeps close to the base of the stairway. Nell only undoes the arrow when the others come back out.   
“I spent months here without stepping a foot out the front door, if you found someone, well, it probably would’ve been surprising.” Gabriel says as they pass him down the steps.   
“Thanks for this.” Carl says, smoking at the priest as Abraham walks over to talk to Rick.  
“Found a short bus outback. It don’t run, but I bet we could fix that in less than a day or two. And Father here says he doesn’t want it. Looks like we found ourselves some transport.” When Rick doesn’t respond, Abraham continues. “You do understand what’s at stake here, right?”  
“Yes, I do.” Rick nods. Not taking his eyes off Judeth as he gently pushes some of her hair away from her face.   
“Now that we can take a breath-” Michonne starts, but Abraham cuts her off.  
“We take a breath, we slow down, shit inevitably goes down.”   
“We need supplies, no matter what we do next.”  
“That’s right. Water, food, ammunition.” Rick agrees with Michonne and walks up the steps to the church.   
“Shortbus ain’t going nowhere.” Nell shrugs, following the others into the church.   
“Bring you back some baked beans.” Daryl adds behind her, forcing Nell to bite her tongue to keep from laughing.  
Despite the easiness of everything, once she has stepped inside the church, Nell has to remind herself not to hold her breath. With a familiar dread in her gut, the freckle covered woman simply listens long enough for Rick and the others to make their plan for a run into a nearby town before she’s turned and gone right back out the doors to stand out on the steps.

~~~

“Y’know,” Tara says, glancing at Nell and Maggie as they wait by the entrance of an old gun shop for Glenn. “I didn’t want to mention anything when we looked this place up in the phone book, but, I just can’t imagine a gun story having leftovers nowadays.”  
“Don’t look good does it?” Maggie signs.  
Nell opens her mouth to say something but she doesn’t get the chance as a loud crash from inside. The trio all raise their weapons but pause when Glenn awkwardly steps back outside.   
“Was it a walker?” Nell asks, slowly relaxing the notched arrow in her hand.  
“Uh, yeah.” Glenn nods, flipping the bayonet at the end of his rifle back into place. “It was a walker.”   
“Really?” Maggie asks, lowering her shotgun.   
“It was a stack of boxes and a mop and I tripped.” The girls laugh as Glenn smiles, shaking his head. “Still... Got what we came for.”  
“You actually found something?” Tara asks as Glenn's hands out his goods.   
“Three silencers stashed in a mini-fridge. Rule number one of scavenging, there’s nothing left in this world that isn’t hidden.” The man calls over his shoulder as Maggie and he walks ahead.  
“C’mon,” Nell nudges Tara with her elbow, “He’s just bragging now.” Tara glances at the blonde, making her smile slightly before following after her sister and brother-in-law.

~~~

“I would like to propose a toast.” Abraham calls over everyone’s chattering and laughter while they all eat, causing everyone to turn to him. “I look around this room… and I see survivors. Each and everyone one of you has earned that title.” The soldier raises his glass of wine, “To the survivors.”  
Abraham waits for them all to finish clapping before he continues. “Is that all you want to be? Wake up in the morning, fight the undead pricks, forage for food, go to sleep at night with two eyes open, rinse, and repeat? ‘Cause you can do that. I mean, you’ve got the strength. You got the skill. Thing is, for you people, for what you can do, that’s just surrender. Now we get Eugene to Washington and he will make the dead die and the living will have this world again. And that is not a bad take away from a little road trip…”  
“Eugene, what’s in DC?”  
“Infrastructure constructed to withstand pandemics even of this fubar magnitude. That means food, fuel, refuge… restart.” The doctor explains after a moment of thought and possible hesitation.   
“However this plays out,” Abraham begins, glancing around at the group. “However long it takes for the restart button to kick in, you can be safe there. Safer than you’ve seen since this whole thing started… Come with us. Save the world for that little one. Save it for yourselves. Save it for the people out there… who don’t got nothing left to do except survive.”  
Everyone is quiet for a long moment. Glancing around at one another before Rick chuckles and smiles at Judeth’s little cooing. “What was that? I think she knows what I’m about to say.” Rick grins, glancing up at the group before back to the little girl in his lap. “She’s in. If she’s in, I’m in. We’re in.”  
Everyone cheers and laughs again before things slowly seem to settle a little bit. Eleanor sticks to the back of the old church, a glass of wine in one hand as one of the many bibles in the church rests in her lap. She doesn’t open the book, but instead just traces her fingers over the indented title.   
“Praying?” The question manages to pop the little world the blonde had been so deep in thought of, making her jump and spill her wine onto the wooden pew beside her. “Shit, sorry, I didn’t mean to-”  
Nell just shakes her head, chuckling quietly as she uses her sleeve to wipe away the spilled wine. “It’s okay, you’re fine.”  
Tara sits down on the pew beside her. “And to answer your question, no. I’m not the religious type.”  
“Oh?”   
Nell finishes what’s left of her wine before speaking. “My parents were, but… I’ve never been much of a believer.” They stay quiet for a beat, Tara watching the group in front of them while Nell fidgets with the silver ring on her necklace.   
“I heard you talk to him that day.” Tara begins softly, glancing over at Nell. “The day we meant. Asking him to help you find your sisters and all.”  
“Daddy always tried to get me to come with him to church and pray and all that shit, but uh,” Nell shakes her head a little and huffs. Blowing a few strains of her hair away from her face. “I wanted to see the city. So yeah… at eighteen, I left and found myself in the city. Away from everything I knew but learning everything I wanted to know.”  
“City girl, eh?” Tara jokes, before turning a little more serious. “What did you do? Before all of this, I mean?”  
“Worked on the farm before I went to the city,” Nell shrugs, “Worked nights at a bar. During the day I was a street performer. Mostly I would draw people for a few bucks, sometimes I would take my guitar and play.”  
“Really?” Tara asks, raising her brows. “Didn’t know you were an artsy type.”  
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Nell laughs.  
“Nothing, nothing.” Tara raises her hands, smiling, “Just didn't expect that is all.”   
Tara waits a beat before tipping her head, “Can I see your drawings?”  
“Oh,” Nell hesitates before grabbing her notebook from her pack, “Um, sure. If you really want.”   
Tara grins at the blonde and opens the first page. She studies the drawing for a moment, nodding at the detail before flipping to the next. She does this for a while, and Nell has to suppress the nerves that light up her chest. She tries not to pay attention, knowing it will only make her more nervous - so she fidgets with the bible still in her lap, flipping through the pages.  
“Is this your family?” She jumps at Tara’s question, looking to the page the woman is tracing lightly with her fingertips.   
“Yes.” Nell slowly nods, a small smile pulling at her lips as she remembers that day. Originally, it had been a photo that daddy had set up. “Daddy had asked one of the members of the church to take a family photo for him. The night we got it printed, I spent the whole night sketching the photo.”  
Tara nods along and slowly turns the page again. Nell simply scoots a little closer and looks over her old sketches with the brunette. It isn’t until Tara begins reaching the most recent of her drawings that she starts to feel her nerves from before coming back.  
Tara smiles at a sketch of Glenn and Maggie. Then one of Carl and Judeth. Another of Beth. One of Rosita aiming her rifle. Another of Rick smiling at Daryl. She pauses briefly on two pages that have small portraits of all the members of their group. Everyone from Rick to Eugene fills the two pages. And Tara smiles when she sees herself on these pages.   
When she turns to the last filled page, Tara gasps. There, filling the page is an incomplete sketch of Tara herself. It looks like she is mid-laugh - light shines along one side of her face as she is turned away and grinning wildly.   
Her hair half pulled up while the other half down, one particular strand curled and stuck to her forehead. The drawing shows the crinkle around her eyes as her head is tipped back and two the side mid laughter. The collar of the shirt she is wearing in it has a small nic in it, her shoulders are raised slightly, and after, the drawing slowly fades out.  
“Holy shit.” Tara whispers and Nell can feel the flames licking her cheeks as she notices - for the first time since she has known the other woman - Tara is shocked into silence.   
“Eh,” Nell shifts slightly in her seat and glances away, rubbing the back of her neck. “I hope you don’t mind. I sort of got caught up in that one. You were just laughing so hard it was hard not to want to draw you, so um, I did.”  
“Holy shit, Nell.” Tara chuckles shyly, still staring at the drawing in her hands. “I’ve never - I mean- This is so detailed. Like holy shit!”  
The two share an awkward little laugh, glancing at one another for a moment before away again. “These are all, they’re all incredible Nell.” Tara eventually states, handing the notebook back to the blonde. “Thanks, for y’know, for letting me see them.”  
“Sure.” Nell nods, smiling slightly as she puts her notebook back into her pack.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading the chapter! Let me know what you think!


	6. Episode Six ~ Four Walls and a Roof (S5:E3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Blood, gore, weapon use, violence, cursing

The door of the church opens and Sasha quickly makes her way towards Father Gabriel. “Stop.” Gabriel stares at her as Rick and Tyreese come to stand behind her. Nell and the others who hadn’t gone out searching for Bob, Daryl, and Carol all turn their attention to them. “What are you doing? What are you doing? This is all connected. You show up, we’re being watched and now three of us are gone.”  
“I... I don’t..” Father Gabriel stumbles over his words, glancing around at everyone like he’s lost. “I don’t have anything to do with this.” When Sasha pulls out her knife, the father quickly jumps back.   
“Don’t!” Rosita yells, moving forward but Abraham catches her and pulls her back.   
“Sasha put it away.” Tyreese tries to calm his sister, but she just advances on the father. Nell gets up from her seat next to Maggie and takes a few steps forward, ready to intervene if things escalate.   
“Who’s out there?” Sasha asks, and Gabriel raises his hands in surrender.  
“I … I don’t have anything-”  
“Where are our people?”   
“I don’t have anything to do -”  
“Where are our people?” Sasha yells, closing the distance between the man and herself, getting into his face.  
“Please,” Gabriel shakingly looks at Rick. “I don’t have anything to do with this.”  
“Why’d you bring us here?” Rick asks the priest.   
“Please, I-” Gabriel tries.  
“Are you working with someone?”  
“I’m alone. I’m alone. I was always alone.”  
“What about that woman at the food bank, Gabriel? What did you do to her?” Rick asks, Gabriel, moving back with every step forward the officer takes. “‘You’ll burn for this’ That was for you. Why? What are you gonna burn for, Gabriel?” Rick quickly grabs the father's shirt and pushes him back against the pulpit. “What? What did you do? What did you do?”  
The father finally pushes Rick’s hand off him, swallowing hard and looking around at everyone as he shakingly begins. “I lock the doors at night. I always lock the doors at night. I always lock the doors at night. I always-”   
“They started coming, my congregation. Atlanta was bombed the night before and they were scared. They were- they were looking for a safe place, a place where they felt safe.” He sobs quietly, “And it was so early. It was so early. And the doors were still locked... You see, it was my choice. There were so many of them and they were trying to pry the shutters and banging on the sidings, screaming at me. And so the dead came for them. Woman… Children.”  
Gabriel takes a shaky breath before he meets Rick's eyes. “Entire families calling my name as they were torn apart, begging me for mercy. Begging me for mercy.” The father holds his hands to his chest as more quiet sobs shake his body. “Damning me to hell. I buried their bones. I buried it all. The Lord sent you here to finally punish me.”   
Gabriel drops and presses his back to the altar, looking back up at Rick. “I’m damned. I was damned before. I always lock the doors. I always lock the doors.”  
Nell can only turn away from the sight of the broken man. Her eyes briefly lock with her sisters, before she walks to the pew she claimed as her own to grab her stuff. She doesn’t make it to her things however when a faint whistle echoes from outside.   
“There’s something… There’s someone outside lying in the grass.” Glenn warns from the window as Sasha rushes out the double doors.  
“Oh, Bob!” Sasha yells as she reaches the unconscious man, Maggie, and Glen right behind her.   
“His leg.” Maggie stumbles, staring at the man.   
Nell notches an arrow from the doorway, sending it into the skull of a walker before jumping down the steps and getting a few paces in front of the others as a buffer. “Get Bob inside, we’ll take care of ‘em.” She already has her fourth arrow notched when Glenn calls for her. Once inside, she makes sure the doors are locked before turning to the group.  
“I was in a graveyard. Somebody knocked me out. I woke up outside this place. It looked like a school. It was that guy, Gareth. And five other ones. They were eating my leg right in front of me. Like it was nothing. All proud like they had it all figured out.” Bob explains, Sasha propping him up against her.   
“Did they have Daryl and Carol?” Rick carefully asks the man.   
Bob shakes his head. “Gareth said they drove off.”  
Nell shakes her head and looks at the others, who seem to all have the same confused looks. But when Bob groans in pain, the attention is quickly drawn back to him.   
“He’s in pain. Do we have anything?” Sasha asks, quickly looking up from Bob. “I think there are pill pockets in the first aid kit.”  
Nell nods and quickly stands up. “Save ‘em.” Bob stops her, making her look down at him.  
“No.” Sasha tries.  
“Really.” He snaps and struggles to push himself up. Bob carefully moves the collar of his shirt over to reveal a nasty bite on his shoulder before locking his gaze on Sasha. “It happened at the food bank.”  
“There’s a sofa in my office.” Gabriel says softly, after a few pained beats of silence. “I know it’s not much but…”  
“Thank you.” Sasha nods, offering the priest a tearful but grateful smile.  
“I got him.” Tyreese states and everyone stands and moves out of the large man's way.  
Nell silently watches to make sure Tyreese doesn’t need a hand, but when she hears Gabriel telling Rick about the elementary school, she cuts into the conversation. “How close, Gabriel?”   
“It’s just a ten-minute walk through the woods from here, due south of the graveyard.” With that, Nell turns sharply to her pew where her pack and gear is.   
“It’s time for a reality check,” Abraham calls, his rifle in hand as everyone turns to him. “We all need to leave for DC right now.”   
“Daryl and Carol are gonna be back.” Rick snaps. “We’re not going anywhere without ‘em.”  
“I respect that, but there is a clear threat here to Eugene.” Abrahan says, “I need to extract his ass before things get any uglier. So if y’all won’t come, good luck to you. We’ll go our separate ways.”  
“You leaving on foot?” Rick asks after the soldier has turned away.   
“We fixed that damn bus ourselves.” The man snaps, meeting Rick in the middle as they face off.  
“There are a lot of us.”  
“You wanna keep it that way? You should come.”  
“Carol saved your life.” Rick snaps, “We saved your life.”   
“Well, I am trying to save yours. Save everyone’s.”   
“We’re not going anywhere without our people.”  
“You’re people took off!”   
“They’re coming back!”  
“To what, picked-over bones?” Abraham yells and Rick shoves the soldier back, Glenn moves between the two men as Rosita tries talking Abraham down.   
“Hey, hey, stop! Now!” Glenn pushes both the men apart and then turns to Abraham. “Do you really think that you’re gonna be any safer leaving right now in the middle of the night?”  
“What about tomorrow?” Glenn tries when Abraham waves him off. “We need each other for this. We need each other to get to DC. we can get through all of it together.”  
“I have an idea.” Tara jumps in, stepping around Rick to get to Glenn and Abraham, nervously glancing between the three men. “If you stay just one more day and help, I’ll go with you to DC, no matter what.”  
Tara keeps her eyes on Abraham a moment longer before glancing back to Rick and then Maggie and Nell, who are behind the man. “Okay?”   
“Glenn and Maggie, too.” Abraham states, making Eleanor’s heart jump at her sister’s name.  
“Wow!” The blonde woman quickly steps up beside Rosita to stand behind the soldier. “No, my sister isn't going anywhere without me and-”  
“Then come with.” Abraham says.  
“We still need to find Beth.” Nell snaps, staring at the taller man, “Beth is still out there and we need to fucking find her.”   
“Good luck, then.” Abraham shrugs and shakes his head. “I’m not interested in breaking up what you have here… Rosita, grab your gear.”   
“Abraham-” Rosita tries.  
“Now.” Abraham looks at Eugene. “Eugene, let's go... Eugene. Move it.”  
“I don’t want to.” Eugene turns his head away.”  
“Now.” Abraham practically snarls, and the doctor stands with a weak ‘okay’.  
As the trio begins walking down the center aisle towards the door, Rick finally speaks up again. “You’re not taking the bus.”   
“Try and stop me.” Everyone shifts at the sudden tension, all but Rick and Abraham.  
“Wait, wait, wait, wait!” Gleen rushes between them again, focusing on Abraham. “You stay… you stay and help us, and we will go with you.”  
“No.” Rick and Nell say it at the same time.  
“It’s not your call.” He says, shaking his head softly. He looks back to Abraham, “You stay, help us.”   
“Half a day.” Abraham begins, “Come high noon, we’re rail lights. I’m not waiting for the other damn shoe to drop.”  
“And we will leave with you.” Maggies agrees.  
“Maggie!” Nell twists around to look at her sister.  
“Nell.” She softly warns, and Nell has to bite her lip to keep her calm. No one makes a move to stop the blonde as she simply turns and storms out of the church, slamming the double doors behind her.   
Eleanor stops herself a few paces from the church steps, closing her eyes tightly. She stands there for what feels like an eternity before the moans of the dead snap her from her thoughts. Opening her eyes, Nell drops her bow and pulls out her machete. She meets the slow-moving walker halfway, the blade of her machete nearly chopping the things head off with a single blow. She finishes the action with a second.  
Nell barely pauses before she has moved onto the next one, not holding anything back as she tears into the monstrous creature. When the four walkers are down, Nell lets out a piercing whistle to draw more from the woods. She takes out her frustrations on every walker that stumbles towards her.   
By the time Nell can barely grip her weapon any longer, there are twelve dead ones by her count. She grabs her bow once more, moving towards the church again. But she stops at the steps instead, finding a seat. And she waits.  
When Rick and the others walk out of the church, Nell stands but before she can even turn around, Rick is speaking. “You're staying here.”   
“What?” Nell stares at the man, “No, I’m not.”   
“Eleanor, you need to stay here.” Rick shakes his head, reaching a hand out to her shoulder. “You aren’t gonna be thinking straight out there and-”  
“Rick,” Nell cuts the man off, shoving his hand off her shoulder. “You don’t get to say that. You do not get to tell me that I’m not in my ‘right mind’.”  
Rick stares for a beat, caught off guard by the woman's sharpness. “You didn’t let me finish, Nell. I need people to stay back, in case something happens while we’re gone. I can’t risk all the fighters being gone.”   
Nell is silent for a moment, before glancing past Rick and to her sister. “It’s alright Nellie, we’ll come back.” At Maggie’s promise, Nell’s shoulders drop before she nods and steps out of the way of the group.  
Maggie grasps Nell’s hand for a moment before passing her. Glenn and Tara both shoot her a smile and Nell watches the small group make their way into the forest. Slowly, the freckled covered woman turns and walks back inside, making sure the door locks behind her before she makes her way to the office the rest of the group is gathered in.

~~~

When the doors burst open, Nell quickly locks the office door. She notches an arrow and draws her bow, watching the door. Carl and Rosita follow her lead and pull their pistols.   
“Well, I guess you know we’re here.” Gareth’s familiar voice calls from the sanctuary. “And we know you’re here. And we’re armed. So there’s really no point in hiding anymore.” Nell listens as Gareth and his group moves through the Sanctuary.  
“We’ve been watching you. We know who’s here.” Gareth slowly calls. “There’s Bob unless you put him out of his misery already. And Eugene, Rosita, Martin's good friend, Tyreese. That spitfire, Eleanor. Carl. Judeth. Rick and the rest walked out with a lot of your guns. Listen, we don’t know where you all are, but this isn’t a big place. So let’s just stop this now before things get more painful than they need to be.”  
Nell shakes her head and adjusts her stance slightly as the door handle rattles. She glances over everyone before slowing her breath and focusing her attention on what’s to come. “Look, you’re behind one of these two doors and we have more than enough firepower to take down both. Can’t imagine that’s what you all want.”  
One of them cocks a gun as if to add emphasis on the statement before Gareth continues. “How about the priest? Father, you help us wrap this up, we’ll let you walk away from this. Just open the door and you can go. You can take the baby with you. What do you say?”  
Nell spares Gabriel a glance, he has his eyes shut and a rosary wrapped around his hands. He’s praying. Then she looks to Judeth, who lets out a loud cry. Carl quickly grabs his baby sister, pulling her to his chest to try and comfort her.  
“It’s your last chance right now to tell us you’re coming out.” Gareth calls when a sudden commotion outside the door makes Nell shift a few steps back.   
“Rick, we’ll fire right into that office. So you lower your gun- ah!”  
Nell lowers her bow as Tyreese moves to look outside the office. She can hear the screaming through the doorway, even if the door wasn’t open. When Tyreese turns back and closes the door, Nell knows exactly what he saw.

~~~

As Abraham had said the night before, at high noon everyone is gathered outside the church after having buried Bob and marked his grave. The group now stands together beside the short bus to say goodbye before those who are going to DC leave.  
“This is our route to DC.” Abraham states, holding out the map to Rick. “We’ll stick to it as long as we’re able. If not, well, you got our destination. Once Eugene gets to the big brains left up there, things are gonna bounce back. This group should be there for it. You should be there.”  
“They will be.” Maggie states, like nothing said or done could change how things are bound to end, Michonne nodding in agreement beside her.   
“We will.” Rick smiles, and Abraham returns it before turning and walking onto the bus.  
“I’ll see you there.” Maggie says, stepping toward Eleanor, but the blonde turns and walks away from her and straight into the church. The blonde only takes a few seconds to gather her thoughts before she walks to the pew and gathers her things. It only takes a couple of minutes before her backpack is over her shoulders, her bow in hand. Glancing one last time at the church, Nel quickly rushes back outside.   
“Hold on!” She yells to Abraham, who had been about to close the bus doors. Nell turns to Rick and the others. “I gotta go with my sister.” She states, scanning everyone slowly as they all nod in understanding.   
She steps to Daryl. “Please, when you find Beth, make sure she gets this.” She presses a folded piece of paper into the man's hand. “She needs to know I had faith in her...”   
Daryl smiles softly and wraps an arm around Nell’s shoulders. “She knows you do, Nell.” He tucks the paper inside his vest with a confident nod as Nell steps back from him.  
With one last look at her family, Nell races over to the bus door. Abraham nodding his head in approval as he opens the door. “Knew you’d come around.”  
Nell just chuckles softly before making her way down the aisle. Tara slides towards the window in her seat and Nell smiles as she takes the seat beside her. “Thanks.” It takes Nell a beat to finally look past her fidgeting fingers. But when she does, Maggie and Glenn both have wide grins to greet her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking around y'all! I hope you enjoy the chapter! Let me know what you think of it!


	7. Episode Seven ~ Self-Help (S5:E5)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Violence, cursing, injury, and weapon use

Nell huffs and lets her book fall onto her chest. Glancing at Tara when she notices the other woman is trying not to laugh. “What’re you laughing at?”   
“I just don’t understand how you can possibly be the oldest.” Tara states, waving her hand in Nell’s general direction. Somewhere along the way on their drive to DC, Nell managed to twist around until she was laying on the bus seat with her feet pressed against the window and her head hanging in the walkway.  
“Yeah,” Maggie calls, turning in her and Glenns seat to look back at the pair, “I don’t get it either.”   
Nell grasps at her chest in mock offense and stares at her sister in horror. “How dare you! I am the most mature person in our family, Maggie Greene!”  
The bus erupts in laughter at her dramatic claim. Glenn shakes his head and Tara and Maggie both laugh to the point of tears. After a while, they fall back into a comfortable silence, however. The old church tape playing softly in the background as they all find something to keep themselves busy with for the time being.   
“I’ll cut it for you tonight.” Rosita laughs, playfully hitting Abrahams's shoulder as the soldier keeps his eyes on the road.   
“Hey, maybe Rosita can give you a trim while she’s at it.” Tara jokingly says, glancing at Eugene with a small smile. “Party’s getting a little long in the back. Or is it your source of power?”   
“I ain’t slayin’ a lion anytime soon.” Eugene says, “I wouldn’t be placing wagers on seein’ me dispatch a thousand Philistines with the jawbone of an ass.”  
“Oh, so you’ll just settle for saving the world, right?”   
“Yeah.” The doctor states his odd around about way of humor falling from his voice. Even Nell can pick up enough to let the words in her book fade into the back of her mind, instead of listening to the conversation of those around her.   
“What’s up?” Tara asks, “Last night?”   
“Nope,” Eugene states, before correcting himself. “Yes, that and tomorrow. And I’m thinking about that preacher, what he did.”  
“Maybe they're just behind us.” Nell can hear her sister say after a while of silence. “Maybe Daryl and Carol came back. Maybe they took the map, found some cars, and they’re just down the road.”  
“They’ll catch up.” Glenn says, his voice soft compared to the harsh wilds outside the bus. “We’re clearing the way for ‘em.”   
“How long will it be?” Maggie asks, and at this point, Nell is just staring at the pages of her book. “After you get to the terminal and do what you have to do?”  
“Depends on a number of factors including density of the infected around target sites worldwide.” Eugene states as if the information should be easily understood.  
“Wait,” Nell pushes her head out into the aisle again to look at the doctor. “Target sites?”   
“Are you talking missiles?” Glenn asks as well.  
Eugene seems to hesitate. “That’s classified.”  
“I thought we were over that.” Glenn signs.  
“What if we all live?”   
“The secrets will matter then?” Nell asks, resting her book on her chest once more as she studies the man.  
“They might.” Eugene states before he begins rambling on again. “Anyway, the speed with which things normalize depends on a number of factors including worldwide weather patterns, which were modeled without the assumption that cars, planes, boats, and trains wouldn’t be pouring hydrocarbons into the atmosphere this long. Changed the game quite a bit when it comes to air-transmissible pathogens.”  
“Why the hair?” Glenn simply asks after a long moment of silence.   
“Because I like it. And no one is takin’ scissor or slipper to it anytime soon. Do you hear me, Miss Espinoza?”   
“Yes, loud and clear.” Rosita grins and everyone chuckles.   
“Y’all can laugh all you want,” Eugene calls.  
“No one was makin’ fun.” Maggie soothes, smiling as she turns back around.   
“The smartest man I ever met happened to love my hair. My old boss, T. Brooks Ellis, the director of the Human Genome Project.” Eugene defends, adding, “He said my hair made me look like, and I quote, ‘a fun guy,’ which I am. I just ain’t Samson.”  
Nell opens her mouth to speak when a loud bang cuts her off and the bus breaks begin screeching. She barely has time to process that the bus is airborne before it crashes back to the road and everything goes dark.   
“Nell-” Eleanor can barely think past the ringing in her ears, the pressure on her chest somehow soft and heavy all at once. “Eleanor-”  
“Dammit, Nell, wake up!” The woman’s blue eyes snap open at the command and immediately, she tries to sit up. Tara’s hands on her shoulders stop her, however, and the blonde quickly glances around until she finds her sister’s worried gaze.  
“Are you okay?” Nell simply nods slowly, pushing the other woman's hands off her as she awkwardly forces herself to stand in the now sideways bus.   
“Alright, we do it live.” Abraham calls as he and Glenn make their way to the back of the bus. “Tara?”   
“Yeah?” The brunette turns her eyes to the soldier.  
“You and Eleanor cover Eugene, come out when it’s clear.”  
“Okay.” Tara nods and she moves out of the way, towards Eugene while Abraham and Glenn force the emergency exit open. Nell grabs her bow from the floor before pulling it over her shoulder and gripping her machete. She moves to the door behind the others, making sure no walkers get too close.   
She glances back at the crash of breaking glass and sees Tara stab a walker in the head before facing Eugene. “Come on. I know it sucks and it’s scary, but it’s time to be brave.”   
“It isn’t voluntary.”  
“It is when you’re screwed either way.” Tara states. “So you cut through the choices that might help somebody. Come on… I’m right behind you.”  
Nell watches them for a moment before turning and jumping out of the bus, kicking back a limping walker before stabbing it in the head. She checks that Tara and Eugene are following her before refocusing. She does her best to ignore the slight ringing in her ears as she and the others do their best to clear the walkers.   
This is when Nell finally lets herself breathe when she knows there is no more threat of walkers around them. The blonde finds herself having to lean against the old run-down truck to keep herself from stumbling.   
“Check Eugene, see if he’s hurt.” Abraham calls after a moment of tense silence falls around the group.  
“I’m fine, just cuts and dings and all.” The doctor says.  
“Check him!” Rosita stands, walking over to Eugene to check him as Abraham told her to when Nell’s legs give out. Her back hits the truck side as she falls into a seated position on the road. Finally taking a moment to think, the blonde reaches up and touches the side of her head. Flinching away as soon as her fingers graze the deep cut going back into her hairline.   
“Shit, Nell,” Tara mutters, walking over and squatting in front of the other woman. “Are you okay?”  
“Just feeling a little queasy, is all.” She lets her eyes slip shut as she leans her head back against the truck.   
“Damn thing opened again.” She hears Abraham say before he continues. “I swear, the cuts are finer than a frog’s hair. They’re just big bleeders.”  
“First aid kits in the bus, you and Nellie both need stitches by the looks of it. I’ll see what we have.” Just as Maggie finishes the sentence, there is an all too familiar rumble of flames. Nell opens her eyes.  
The woman stares at the burning bus. Like the rest of the group, too caught up in the deadly beauty of the flames to speak. “We’re not stopping.” Abraham finally declares. “We’re rolling on. We’ll find another vehicle down the road. The mission hasn’t changed.”  
“Devil’s advocate, nothing more-” Eugene starts, him and Maggie bumping shoulders as he talks. “We smashed to a stop hard. We spent a lot of time rolling things out of the road. The church is just 15 miles back that way-”  
“No.” Abraham doesn’t even let the doctor finish his sentence before he cuts in. “We don’t stop. We don’t go back. We’re at war, and retreat means we lose. The road fights back, the plan gets jacked. You all know this… now, we get through this because we have to. Every direction is a question. We don’t go back!”   
Tara helps Nell to her feet and wraps an arm around the blonde's waist to support her weight. They take a few steps towards the rest of the group. Where Glenn has pulled Abraham to a stop.   
“You okay?”   
“I’m fit as a damn fiddle.”   
“We are going with you. You are calling this thing… I just need to know you’re good.”  
Abraham takes a moment to think but nods his head. “This is how things stop. I can’t afford that right now. The world can’t afford it. Listen, I took a pretty hard shot to the sack with that crash. I am stressed and depressed to see that ride die, but if you say we’re rolling on, I’m good.”   
“We’re rolling on.” Glenn states after a beat.   
“I’m gonna rub some dirt on it and walk it off,” Abraham says.  
“We’ll find what we need like we always have, on the way.” Rosita states and everyone nods along.   
“I’m not rubbing dirt on anything.” Maggie jokes and Nell raises a hand.  
“I second that.”   
“Maybe we can find some bikes.” Tara adds, glancing at Nell with a shrug. “Bikes don’t burn.” They both chuckle quietly as the group begins moving forward again. 

~~~

As night falls, the group finds themselves in a little bookshop after having cleared it. After the group has covered the windows with cardboard and cloth and moved around the bookshelves for makeshift rooms, they all settle.  
Nell tries not to flinch away from her sister's touch as she carefully stitches up the wound on her forehead. Maggie keeps her eyes on the needle as she works, but she can’t stop herself from saying something.   
“So,” She begins, “Tara seems nice.”  
Nell freezes briefly, her eyes darting from the ground to her sister. “Maggs, I swear if you say what I think you’re gonna say-”  
“I’m just sayin’.” Maggie laughs, glancing down to meet her sister's eyes. “You two get on well, is all.”   
“Well,” Nell looks past her, spotting Tara and Eugene talking a little ways away. “She’s a good person.” She finally decides, shrugging a little as she notices her sister’s stare. “She’s a friend, I guess.”   
Maggie smiles softly and nods, focusing her attention back on her work. “All set… Nellie,-”  
“Maggie-”  
“Just let me!” Maggie laughs, grinning at her sister. “I know you never said it, but, well I love you for who you are. No matter who you end up loving.”  
Nell stares at her for a moment before clearing her throat and smiling a little, nodding. “Thanks, Maggs.”  
“Try and get some rest.” Maggie nods, standing up before she quickly adds. “Don’t go messing around with those stitches neither! I know how you are, I ain’t gonna restitch ‘em for ya!”   
Nell chuckles and waves her sister off. “Alright, alright! Get outta my hair, ya fuckin’ nuisance.”   
Maggie flips her off as she walks over to Glenn and Nell grins.  
~~~

“This town isn’t in bad shape.” Maggie states as the group gather in the sitting area of the little bookshop. Nell makes her way over to lean against the arm of the chair her sister is in. “This store wasn’t even touched. We could make a good base here. We spend one last day doing a sweep for supplies.”  
“We sweep as we go.” Rosita states, glancing away from Abraham as she continues. “We’ve done it since Houston, we’re not stopping now.”  
“You heard the lady.” Ahrabam states. “We’re taking it north.”  
“We tapped out the toilet. Broad River is five miles west. At the very least, we stock up there before we find wheels.” Tara says, crossing her arms.  
“We got a vehicle,” Abraham says as she stands from his seat. “Just so happens… It’s got 500 gallons of water on it.” Everyone follows the soldier outside as he leads them to an old fire truck.  
The fire truck is parked in front of a fire department across the street from the bookstore they had stayed the night in. Abraham quickly gets to the truck as the others all begin to poke around to see what they might find. When the truck starts, everyone cheers.   
“About time things started going our way!” The soldier calls with a large grin on his face. Everyone moves as he pulls the truck forward before the engine knocks and it stops.  
“We’ll find another ride.” Glenn signs as Abraham jumps out of the cab.  
“If there was a ride worth a shit in this town, we’d have seen it. This thing’s done some crowd clearing. Right up into the intake.” The soldier says, eyeing the truck. “Which means we’ve got an air filter filled with damn human remains. And there is no damned corner on this damned earth that has not been dicked hard beyond all damned recognition.”   
The soldier snags a plastic bag from the road and begins trying to get the bloody, rotten skin from the truck's intake. “Abraham?” Rosita gets the man's attention before she starts. “That feeds the radiator. The intakes for the engine are actually on the roof.”  
Abraham stares before nodding and standing back up. When a tire suddenly rolls out of the doorway behind the group, everyone turns to see walkers stumbling out. “Tara! Maggie!” Glenn calls for the two women to get out of the truck as Abraham and Nell both move forward to fight the undead.  
Nell uses her machete to hack down a couple of the walkers, trying to keep out of Abraham’s way as he whacks one down with the stock of his rifle, using it as if it were a baseball bat. When water from the fire hose suddenly begins blasting walkers, everyone quickly ducks out of the way. After a few moments, the walkers are down and the water finally shuts off.   
Nell steps out and looks up at the top of the truck, laughing at the sight of Eugene proudly standing there behind the house. “I’ve been to eight country fairs and one goat rodeo. I never seen anything like that.” Abraham calls up to the man.  
Nell shakes her head before a shiver runs down her spine. “That was badass and all, but uh, I am soaked and it’s fuckin’ cold.”  
“There was a Goodwill over there by the bookstore.” Glenn says, “It’s pretty blown up, but there might be some supplies, some dry clothes maybe?”   
Abraham just walks past him. “Not necessary. I can clear that intake in two shakes.” The man states before he climbs up onto the truck. “Then the engine will get some wind and so will we… You’ll air dry. We roll on.”  
Nell shakes her head, her wet hair sticking to her face when she does. Abraham starts laughing, having put his hands on his knees. Turning around, there are words spray-painted on the ground. ‘Sick inside, let them die.’  
“This shit is screwed up!” He laughs out before he kneels and takes care of the intake.

~~~

Once again pulled off the road, Nell huffs as she hears Abraham cursing from inside the truck. She simply keeps pacing, making her way back where Eugene, Maggie, and Tara all are. Noticing her sister and the doctor talking, the blonde walks over to Tara.  
“How’s the head?” Said woman asks, glancing over at the blonde as she comes to a stop beside her.   
“Hurts like hell.” Nell plainly says, earning a chuckle from the other woman.  
“Whoa, what the hell is that?” Glenn calls, making everyone turn their attention to the man.  
“What?” Maggie calls, standing to glance around the truck to her husband.   
“Wind’s picking up. You’re about to smell it.” Everyone waits for a moment before they all react at once.  
“The hell is that?” Nell covers her nose and mouth with her hand as a horrendous smell invades her nose.  
“Whatever’s making that stench,” Abraham calls as he leans out of the truck. “It ain’t nothin nice.” The soldier hops out of the truck and shoulders his rifle. “We’re not stopping.”  
“Uh, we’re stopped.” Tara calls, and Nell chuckles before nudging the taller woman and following after Abraham.  
It takes the group a few minutes to get past the tree line and to crest the hill to see the open fields. But they all stop at the sight ahead of them. A massive horde of walkers, maybe five miles ahead of them is walking across the street and into the opposite field. They all stand and stare for a few beats before Glenn turns and starts back in the direction they’d come from.   
“Let’s go.” They all turn, following the man but stop when Rosita calls for Abraham and the soldier doesn’t budge.  
“Abraham, let’s get out of here.” Rosita tries again, and Nell can barely hear the man muttering to himself.   
“Hold up.” He calls.  
“We gotta go.” Nell states, taking a few steps closer to the soldier.  
“No. No, we don’t.” Abraham shakes his head. “They can’t hear us and they can’t smell us. Not from here. We’re fine.”   
“Yeah, this is the definition of ‘fine’.” Tara snarks.  
“We need the map, there’s got to be a detour.” Glenn tries.  
“I’m not doing it.” Abraham states, pacing the width of the road. “We detoured and detoured and detoured from Houston to Georgia. I’m not playing that game anymore.”  
“We are not going through this, okay?” Glenn states, walking closer to the other man and pointing to the horde behind them. “It isn’t happening.  
“You got a shitstorm behind door A and a storm of shit behind door B, if you’re lucky, it’s walkers or a shot-up truck. But sooner or later you get cornered… you wind up stayin’ and you wind up killin’. We don’t go back. We can’t go back.”   
Glenn takes a moment to choose his words carefully. “I’m not talking about going back. Just south a few miles.”  
“No.” Abraham snaps, and Nell shakes her head.   
But it is Eugene who speaks. “We already hit a full stop ‘cause of an air filter compromised by innards. That will happen again.”   
“Then we hit ‘em with the hose.”  
“The tank is empty, Abraham.” Rosita states as the soldier paces back across the road.  
“If we floor it-”   
“We still hit them, they still slow us down, and then they stop us.” Nell snaps, waving her hand at the hundreds of dead only miles ahead of them.   
“I’m not saying we just go straight.” Abraham defends.  
“That’s the way the road goes.” Maggie tries.  
“We can get through! I know it! And that means we are not going south, going around, or going back!” Abraham yells, glaring at the group before him.  
“No.” Rosita states firmly, making the soldier turn to her. “They’re right.” At this, Abraham seems to pause before turning and walking back the way they all came. His shoulders tense and squared as he shoves Eugene ahead of him and holds tightly onto the doctor's arm.  
“Hey!”  
“Abraham, what are you doing?” Rosita calls, “Stop!”  
“Let go of him.” Glenn calls.  
“I am not going to let you do this.”  
“Hey, hey, stop.” Tara tries to put her hand on Abraham’s chest to stop him, but he shoves her away. Making her stumble back several steps and nearly fall.  
“Hey, you are done!” Nell yells and grabs a hold of the soldier's free arm. Forcing him to a stop. “You are done!”  
“Do not! Do not! I told you do not touch me! Do not touch me!” He shoves the woman back with each word, finding the front of her shirt and yanking at her. The pair yelling and screaming in one another’s face as the others in the group try to separate them.  
“I’m not a scientist!” Eugene raises his voice, making everyone freeze. “I am not a scientist!” He pulls free from the soldier’s grasp as everyone stares at him. “I lied. I’m not a scientist. I don’t know how to stop it. I’m not a scientist.”   
“You are a scientist. I’ve seen the things you can do.” Rosita calls, the first to move a muscle.   
“I know things.” Eugene shakes his head.  
“You just… ‘know things’?” Glenn asks.  
“I know I’m smarter than most people, I know I’m a very good liar, and I know I needed to get to DC.”  
“Why?” Nell asks, still staring as Eugene turns to her.  
“Because I do believe that locale holds the strongest possibility for survival, and I want to survive. If I could cheat some people into taking me there, well, I just reasoned that I’d be doin’ them a solid, too, considering the perilous state of the city of Houston, the state of everything.”  
Abraham squats down, staring at the ground and Rosita takes a deep breath. “People died trying to get you here.”  
“I’m aware of that,” Eugene states, “Stephanie, Warren, Pam, Rex, Roger, Josiah, Dirk, and Josephine. And Bob.”  
Eugene looks to the ground, sounding on the verge of tears as Nell turns away and puts her hands on her head. “You see, I lost my nerve as we grew closer, for I am a coward… and the reality of getting to our destination and disclosing the truth of the matter became some truly frightening shit. I took it upon myself to slow our roll. Find time to finesse things so then when we got there... “   
“But at this moment, I fully realize there are no longer any agreeable options. I was screwed either way. I also lied about T. Brooks Ellis liking my hair. I do not know T. Brook Ellis. But I did read one of his books, and he seemed like the type of guy that wouldn’t blink twice at a Tennessee Top Hat. Again… I am smarter than you. Now, you may want to leave me here-”  
Something rattles and Nell turns just in time to see Abraham’s fist collide with Eugene hard enough to force the man backward. And he keeps going. Forcing the other man back against the front of the fire truck and whaling on him. Blow after blow.  
“Hey!” Glenn yells, “come on!”   
Glenn, Nell, and Tara all rush after the pair, Glenn and Nell grabbing Abraham and trying to yank the soldier away as Tara tries to catch his arm to keep him from throwing another hit.  
But he does. And this time, Eugene’s head bounces off the truck. Nell watches his eyes roll before he falls forward. Rosita puts herself between the soldier and the fallen man. Her hand resting on her pistol before Abraham seems to catch up with what he just did. Nell watches as the man looks at his bloody hand before storming around the side of the truck.  
“Eugene, are you there?” Rosita, Tara, and Maggie are all kneeled beside the unconscious man. His face bloody. A gash above his eyes, his nose, and mouth bleeding. His eyes are still open but he isn’t responsive. Nell stares before turning and following after Abraham, finding him on his knees beside the truck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading everyone and thank you for commenting on your thoughts on the last chapter.


	8. Episode Eight ~ Crossed (S5,E7)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: Hey guys, I'm sorry I disappeared for so long lol. Been havin' a hell of a time with my brain lately.
> 
> Warnings: Violence, cursing, use of weapons, blood, gore, death, character death

Nell’s moved to be leaned against the side of the truck, keeping Abraham in her peripheral vision. “They got no clue we’re here.” Glenn states, coming to a stop to stand beside Tara. Who has gathered water from the truck.   
“That’s great news for GREEATM. In less great news for GREEATM, we just scraped the bottom of the water barrel.”  
“What the hell is GREEATM?” Nell asks, glancing at the two.   
“Us. Group name. Band of brothers.” Tara states, glancing over her shoulder at Nell, who has moved to stand beside Glenn. The brunette waves her hand at the water bottles - she has each about halfway filled. Each has an initial on the cap.   
“GREEATM.” Tara states, before turning fully to face the two. “Thinking about getting it tattooed on my knuckles... Sorry, I’m just trying to think of something else, you know?”   
“Yeah.” Glenn smiles as she tosses him the bottle with a G. Nell nods a little.   
Maggie walks over from around the front of the truck and Rosita does the same from where she had been watching Abraham with Nell.   
“Anything?” Nell asks her sister.  
“No.” Maggie shakes her head.   
“Should we get him to the church?” Glenn asks after a beat.   
“Moving him could make it worse.” Nell shakes her head, shifting her weight onto her other foot.   
“What will make him better?” Rosita asks.  
“Waking up.” Maggie's glances at her. “If he doesn’t…”  
After a beat, Rosita turns and grabs the bottle with an A on the cap. Walking over to Abraham to offer it to him. Nell watches closely but doesn’t follow. Not until the soldier smacks the water away and Rosita yells.  
“Look at me! Look at me!” When Abraham stands, Nell quickly walks over, but Maggie beats her there and pulls her revolver. The sound of the gun being pulled from her belt makes Abraham turn.   
The soldier takes a step towards her, fully turning and Maggie pulls back the hammer. “Sit down or I will put you down.” Abraham stares but eventually goes back to his kneeled position. Maggie slowly places the hammer back in it’s resting place and holsters it on her belt.  
“Well,” Tara draws slowly, “What’s next on the agenda?”  
“We need more water,” Glenn states as everyone begins shifting back together after the tension fades.   
“There’s a creek up the road a few miles southwest of here.” Rosita says, shoulder the strap of her rifle.   
“Y’all go, I’ll stay here,” Maggie tells them as she walks back over.  
“We’re not leaving you here alone.” Nell shakes her head.   
“Nellie, I’ll be fine. We need as much water as we can get, so that means you all need to go.”  
“You sure?” Glenn asks, cutting in before Nell can argue further.   
Maggie nods. “I am.”

The hike doesn’t take too long, maybe forty-five minutes tops. The four have to be mindful of their steps once they leave the road and make their way into the wooded field. Eventually passing by a fallen electrical pole with a few walkers stuck under it. By the looks of them, they were electricians.   
“Just stay here, guys. Don’t get up. There’s nothing for you in Washington.” Tara calls to them jokingly.  
“That’s not funny.” Rosita snaps at her.  
“It’s not not funny.”  
“Hey,” Glenn cuts in before the pair can start anything. “I get that we’re all dealing with things in different ways-”  
“Listen, I don’t know what to do without DC anymore.” Tara cuts him off, “But I’m not dealing with it. I’m over it. I just want him to be okay. Eugene wasn’t strong. He isn’t fast... He doesn’t know how to use a weapon. The truth hurt, but he was useless. He had one skill that kept him living. Are we supposed to be mad at him ‘cause he used it?”  
“Damn right,” Glenn states before the group falls back into silence. After this, it’s probably only another ten or so minutes until they find the creek. But when Glenn kneels and fills his bottle, the water is murky. “Perfect.”  
“Think it’s any clearer upstream?” Tara asks, but they all turn to Rosita as she tears part of her sleeve off.  
“Probably not. Doesn’t matter... Let me see it.” She takes a step closer to Glenn, and he hands her the bottle. After a few minutes of scavenging around the little clearing, Rosita states she has what she needs and, fairly easily, builds a way for them to filter the water.  
“So, you just built a water filter in two minutes, huh?”   
“Eugene taught me. Takes a while, but it’ll be clear. Then we can boil it.”  
Nell finds herself poking around the creek bank as the others talk. “Were you with Abraham before it all happened?” Tara asks,  
“No,” Rosita shakes her head. “I was with other people just trying to make it.”  
“How’d you wind up together?” Glenn asks next.  
“We crossed paths in Dallas. Me and my group were fighting off some dead ones and he jumped in from out of nowhere, with that big truck. Rest in peace. He had Eugene in the cab. And afterward, he told me that he was trying to save the world. And that he saw what I could do. And he wanted my help… he was the first person to ask me for that since this all started… maybe he was lying too.”  
Nell doesn’t say anything as they fall quiet again. But at a splash in the water, her interest is peaked. “You guys see that? Those ripples are fish.”  
“Okay, how?” Tara asks as Glenn and Nell share a little smile.  
“Come on.” The little group makes their way back to the walkers under the electrical pole. After taking care of them they pull off their windbreakers and tear out the netting inside.  
“Rosita,” Glenn calls, catching her attention before tossing her the netting.   
Nell glances over to Tara, who is still squatting by one of the walkers. “How we doing there, Tara?”  
She stands with a mud-coated backpack and grins. “Pretty damn good. How about you?”  
They all make their way back to the creek without any run-ins. Tara sets on searching through her find while Nell, Glenn and Rosita focus on catching some fish. While Glenn and Rosita hold the net, Nell stomps around in the water to scare the fish their way.  
“Almost… almost… Now!”   
When the two yank up the net, they break into a cheer. “It worked!”   
“Hell yes.” Nell grins and shakes out her arms to try and get some of the water off of her as she comes back to the shore. Nell laughs when she catches Glenn asking if Rosita knows how to gut and clean a fish.  
“Good, we’re gonna need that…” He smiles, “Wherever we end up, you in?”   
“I’m in.” Rosita returns his smile.  
“Guys,” Tara calls, catching everyone’s attention as she holds something covered in mud up. “You will never believe what’s in this bag.” She grins, making Nell raise her brows as she wades the rest of the way out of the creek.

~~~

“You know,” Glenn begins. “The more I think about it. Maybe it wasn’t completely not not not funny.”   
Tara smirks and Nell and Rosita both laugh as the brunette plays with the Yo-yo she found. And as the group comes to the road and they all can hear the walkers, Glenn stops them. “Hey, don’t even think about it.”

~~~

Seeing Michonne, Carl, and Gabriel outside the church is unsettling, but it made it clear the building is no longer safe. So Abraham calls a warning before he rams the staircase and parks the fire truck in its place. Nell can see the walkers reaching through the busted up doorway and the windows. When Abraham kills the engine, they all climb out of the truck.   
Maggie and Michonne share a hug as soon as they see one another and Nell tips back Carl's hat. “How ya doin’ kid? How’s Judeth?”   
“We’re okay.”   
“You’re back.” Michonne states as she and Glenn grab arms.   
“Eugene lied. He can’t stop it. Washington isn’t the end.” Glenn explains.  
Nell steps forward and Michonne gives her a side hug. “Where is everybody?” Her question brings a smile to the other woman's face as she grabs Maggie and Nell’s hands.   
“Beth’s alive. She’s in a hospital in Atlanta. Some people have her, but the others went to get her back.”  
Nell looks at Maggie before the pair quickly turn their attention back to Michonne. “Do we know which one?”  
“Grady Memorial.”   
Maggie covers her face with her hands and Nell immediately steps forward and hugs her younger sister. “Oh my God.”  
The pair share a shaking laugh and when they pull apart Maggie and Glenn hug. “Let’s blow this joint, and go save your sister.” Tara grins and Nell laughs, her and Maggie both quickly nodding as the group gets underway. 

~~~

As the fire truck slows outside of the hospital, Nell can barely keep herself still. She’s opened the door and jumped out of it before it’s even parked. She grabs her bow and gets herself ready before glancing over her shoulder at the others. They all nod to her, raising their weapons as well. The group moves forward as one.   
Inside the fenced-off parking lot are a few old military tents and many dead lay around, disregarded. When the first walker stumbles forward, Glenn takes it down with his knife. Michonne takes the next with her sword in one swift motion. And Nell slowly begins to worry the closer they get to the building.  
They’re to the inside fence when the hospital doors open and Rick walks out. The man can’t bring himself to meet Eleanor’s gaze when he spots her. The stone in Nell's stomach turns to shards of ice. She glances over her shoulder quickly and the others have lowered their weapons.   
Sasha comes next, Tyreese helps Carol walk not but a few steps behind. And then everything falls away as Eleanor’s gaze locks onto Daryl and the limp body in his arms. The bow and notched arrow in Nell’s hands fall as she takes one trembling step forward.   
“No.” She shakes her head slowly, her voice giving way as she stares. “No, no, not her. No-” The words barely escape her lips before she’s stumbling out of the way. Daryl stops beside her, and Eleanor feels like she is about to throw up.  
'Her eyes are still open.' Beth’s once beautiful but now glazed and dull eyes stare blankly into the clear sky above them. Eleanor can barely keep her hand from trembling as she raises it to gently close her baby sister’s eyes. Her hand rests on Beth’s pale cheek before she stumbles a step back. She's still warm.  
Maggie’s screams finally seem to hit the woman as the oldest Greene girl takes one-two-four-ten steps away. Leaning on and pressing her forehead to the brick wall as she finds it. Her legs feel unstable under her weight as she sucks in a breath, forcing her lungs to expand. To anyone watching, Eleanor looks frozen in place. Her eyes tightly shut and her hands on the wall to support herself.   
But then comes the fury. And the heartbreak. And the guilt. And everything that follows. The rage breaks past Eleanor’s lips and all the air leaves her lungs in one gut-wrenching scream. All of the words and the thoughts she cannot form breaking through the air with her voice as it runs raw.  
How can this be happening? Why Beth? Why did it have to be her? Why didn’t I stay? Why didn’t I fucking stay? Eleanor doesn’t realize what she is doing until the second her fist connects with the brick wall. The white painted wall quickly becomes stained in red as her knuckles once again slam against the bricks.  
With every thought, every scream, every tear that escapes her - her knuckles bust against the hard walls. Again. And again. And again. Until Nell can’t feel her fingers. Until she feels the popping of joints and bones.   
Until arms wrap around her middle. Eleanor screams again, thrashing and fighting against the arms pulling her backward. All her guilt and all her pain pushing her harder to break free. When her foot meets the wall, Eleanor pushes off with everything she has.   
Sending her and the one holding her to the hard asphalt parking lot. Nell barely gets a glimpse of brown eyes before Tara is pulling her into her chest. Her arms wrapped around Eleanor tightly as she cries. She shoves and hits, trying to get away. Until she isn’t. Until her fingers grasp blindly at the other woman's shirt.   
Clutching onto her for dear life as her world shatters. As her shoulders give way to the trembling sobs that rack through her entire being. Her eyes burning from the tears. Her throat on fire, raw from her emotions. Her voice hoarse and broken as she mutters ‘no’s and ‘it’s not real’ and ‘this is my fault’ to no one but herself.   
Eleanor has no idea how long she stays tucked in Tara’s chest. She doesn’t know if it has only been seconds or hours. But she sees Maggie. Sees her sister in her husband's arms, collapsed and broken as she cries.   
“Maggie-” She doesn’t recognize the sound of her own voice, but she reaches out and finds her sister's hand. Clutching onto her as she shifts closer - Tara moves with her willingly - not breaking their contact.   
'I have Maggie. I have to survive for Maggie.'

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading everyone! Hope you all have a great holiday!   
> Let me know what ya think!


	9. Episode Nine ~ Them  (season five, episode ten)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Violence, cursing, gore, weapon use, intrusive thoughts, suicidal thoughts

It just seems like it keeps coming. Blow after blow after blow. It’s like the world wants to beat her down and break her. First with momma, then Shawn, then the farm. Then the prison and daddy, and now Beth and Tyreese.  
Eleanor can remember standing over the grave. Numbly listening as father Gabriel said a prayer. She can remember considering just laying down and dying. Letting the world take her. Giving up. But the thought of Maggie stops her. The thought that she would be abandoning her little sister in this world alone.  
That is when the blonde decided she would survive for her sister. No matter what, she would not leave Maggie to suffer alone. So, that’s what she is doing. Now, the group has no home and no destination. But they keep moving. Because what else can they do?

Daryl and Carol split off as the group walks, and Nell watches them slowly disappear into the foliage of the woods around them. Nells is snapped back to attention when her sister begins yelling.  
“You don’t know shit!” Maggie snaps at father Gabriel. The two having stopped walking. “You had a job. You were there to save your flock, right? But you didn’t. You hid. Don’t act like that didn’t happen.”   
Maggie walks away from the shocked priest, and Nell can see the pain in her sister’s face. Gabriel watches after her briefly, and Nell almost wants to say something. To apologize to the preacher. But she can’t find the words when the thought crosses her mind. So instead she just follows after Maggie.  
The group keeps moving, doing their best to keep a good distance between themselves and the small horde gathering behind them. But when they come to a bridge, they slow. Rick, Michonne, Glenn, Maggie, Abraham, and Sasha stay at the front as they send everyone else to the opposite side.  
Nell keeps an arrow notched as she watches the six keep close to the side of the bridge and dodge the walkers. Pushing the dead down the hill and into the river. It works, everyone is able to save energy and it is efficient. But Nell watches, and she can see as Sasha squares her shoulders before pushing past Maggie and Abraham.  
Sasha grabs one of the walkers and it is obvious that the plan is changing, and fast. Daryl and Carol return in the nick of time, helping Rick and Glenn take a few more walkers down. Nell doesn’t move from her spot besides Carl and Judeth, but she keeps her eyes peeled and her bow ready in case she has to act. But in the end, the others have it handled.   
When they rejoin the groups, they continue onward. Following the road. And they do not stop until they come across what might have been a camp at the beginning of everything. Everyone splits up to search the vehicles parked along the sides of the road.

Leaning back in the driver’s seat of a beat-up old ford, Nell opens the glove compartment and stares for a beat as her eyes take in the sight of the small snub nose revolver and a pack of cigarettes. Nell finally reaches past the pistol and takes the pack. Inside the cartridge are about sixteen cigarettes along with a cheap plastic lighter.  
Nell pulls the lighter and one of the cancerous sticks out, lighting it as she brings it to her lips. The smoke fills her lungs and the blonde leans her head back on the seat as it makes her lungs ache.   
Finally glancing back at the glove compartment, she grabs the revolver and flicks open the cylinder. Four bullets are left in the eight slots. 'Only takes one.' Nell signs as she flicks it back shut and subconsciously pulls the blood-stained letter from her pocket.   
The woman traces her fingers over Beth’s name on the front fold. Blood discolors the B and e. She considers opening the letter when the passenger side door opens and shuts.   
“Didn’t know you smoked.” Tara states, making the blonde glance at her as she adjusts in the seat.  
Nell lets another puff of smoke leave her lips as she shoves the paper back into her pocket. “Stopped for her.”   
Eleanor pauses for a moment before shaking her head with a dry chuckle. “Beth had been over at mine for a movie marathon one weekend. The kid had passed out barely past ten, so I thought I would step outside for a smoke… the way that girl threw open the door and started scolding me for having one of these… well, woulda thought she was the big sister... I never touched another after that night. At least not until now.”  
Nell clears her throat and takes another deep drag of the poisonous smoke. The feeling is familiar and heavy. The guilt only adds to its weight as her thoughts linger on her sister's memory. “No reason not to let this shit kill me now, right?” She barely mutters the words, keeping her blue eyes focused out the front windshield as the smoke slowly obscures her vision. Nell takes the cigarette from her lips and presses her knuckles there when she realizes its tears that obscure her sight. Not the smoke.  
Without a word, Tara slips across the bench seat and wraps one arm around Nell’s shoulders, taking the cigarette with her free hand and putting it out in the truck's ashtray. And Nell lets her. She lets Tara pull her into a tight hug and finds herself hiding in the other woman's shoulder. Her still healing hands gripping at the front of Tara’s shirt as she searches for an anchor.  
“You don’t have to be strong all the time, Nell.” Tara whispers softly, “You are allowed to break.”  
“That’s just it.” Nell eventually says, pulling away suddenly and wiping away her tears. She can’t meet the other woman's eyes. “I do.” Nell pockets the pack of cigarettes and the revolver before grabbing her backpack. She doesn’t look back as she slips out of the truck and closes the door.   
"If I let myself break, I won’t make it another day." 

~~~

The group ends up sitting along the road. All of them worn out and exhausted. Nell lights another cigarette and lays back in the grass. She lets the nicotine numb her mind as the silence drags on around them.  
“So,” Tara drawls, “All we found was boozes and a pack of cigarettes?”   
“Yeah.” Rosita nods slowly.   
“That’s not gonna help,” Tara says, and Nell glances up to see Abraham taking a swing from the bottle of scotch in his hand.  
“He knows that.”  
“It’s just gonna make it worse.”  
“Yes, it is.”  
“He’s a grown man.” Eugene cuts in, “And I truly do not know if things can get worse.”  
“They can,” Nell states, shutting her eyes to the sky. She ignores the feeling of eyes on her as she tries to rest. She might have actually dozed off if it weren’t for the rustling and growls that suddenly fill the air.  
On instinct, Nell spins onto her front and pushes herself onto her hands and knees. Her hand gripping the machete on her belt as she spots the pack of wild dogs on the opposite side of the road. The dogs growl and bark, looking like they might pounce before a suppressed gun goes off and everyone turns to Sasha.  
It isn’t long before the group has a small fire pit dug and flames burning. The fresh meat slowly cooks over the flames. Nell has to force herself not to think about what it is they are eating. She knows they need this, as much as she hates to admit it. They need it. And she eats, the dull ache in her stomach slowly subsiding. 

~~~

After walking for who knows how long, the group stumbles upon ten bottled waters and four milk jugs filled with water. On it, there is a note, ‘from a friend’. It puts them all on edge. Everyone draws their weapons but they do not leave the water.  
“What else are we gonna do?” Tara asks, watching as Rick paces.   
“Not this.” He states. “We don’t know who left it.”  
“If that’s a trap, we already happen to be in it.” Eugene states, staring at the water. “I, for one, would like to think it is indeed from a friend.”  
“What if it isn’t?” Carol asks as she takes a step forward. “They put something in it?”  
Eugene reaches down and grabs one of the bottles. “Eugene.” Rosita steps forward.  
“What are you doing, dude?” Tara asks as the man unscrews the cap.  
“Quality assurance.” Abraham smacks the bottle away when Eugene holds it up to his mouth. Everyone stares, besides the soldier, who moves away from the others.  
“We can’t,” Rick states, before a loud clap of thunder echoes around them all. Everyone looks to the sky and just as things look their worst. Rain begins to pour down around the group. Everyone laughs as the cold water soaks into them. Nell turns her face up to the sky after watching Tara and Rosita lay down.  
“I’m sorry, my Lord.” Gabriel softly cries, looking up to the cloudy sky.   
“Everyone get the bags. Anything you can find.” Rick calls quickly and the group moves to put out bottles, bags, and anything they can find that will catch the rainwater. Nell’s attention is drawn to Carl, however, when the young man holds his hat over a crying Judeth. Everyone slows at the suddenly loud, and close, thunderclap.  
“We need to move.” Nell yells over the rain, turning her eyes to Rick as the man nods.  
“There’s a barn,” Daryl calls, looking between Nell and Rick.  
“Where?” The officer asks. The group begins moving then. It takes a short jog to reach the barn with Daryl leading the way. The group sweeps it quickly, making sure there is no life or unlife within. And as it gets darker and darker, the group all either find their own little corners, or they gather around a small fire.  
While Nell doesn’t join them by the warmth of the flames, she stays close by. Eventually letting herself relax against the beam she is leaned back on. Her attention on the burning end of her cigarette as she takes another slow drag. She listens as Carol, Glenn, Daryl, Michonne, and Rick all talk around the fire. Their familiar voices are comforting during the storm, but she keeps her eyes open and moving. From where Maggie lays, her back to the group and a small lantern in front of her, to where Abraham has found himself a dark corner to get drunk in.   
“I used to feel sorry for kids that have to grow up now. In this.” Rick states and Nell doesn’t have to turn to know the man is thinking of his son and daughter. “But I think I got it wrong. Growing up is getting used to the world. This is easier for them.”  
“This isn’t the world. This isn’t it.” Michonne cuts in and Nell lets out a silent puff of smoke.  
“It might be... It might.” Glenn mumbles softly and Nell lets her eyes shut as she listens in.   
“That’s giving up,” Michonne argues.  
“It’s reality.” Glenn signs.  
“Until we see otherwise, this is what we have to live with.” Rick cuts in. stopping the two from saying anything more. “When I was a kid… I asked my grandpa once if he ever killed any Germans in the war. He wouldn’t answer. He said that was grown-up stuff, so… so I asked if the Germans ever tried to kill him. But he got real quiet… he said he was dead the minute he stepped into enemy territory. Every day he woke up and told himself, ‘Rest in peace. Now get up and go to war.’ And then after a few years of pretending he was dead… he made it out alive.”  
“That’s the trick, I think.” Rick continues. “We do what we need to do and then we get to live. But no matter what we find in DC, I know we’ll be okay. Because this is how we survive. We tell ourselves… that we are the walking dead.”  
Nell slowly opens her eyes and lets go of the cancerous smoke in her lungs. She taps the embers of her cigarette into a small can. “We ain’t them.” She turns at Daryl’s quiet but sharp tone. Watching, like the others, as the hunter moves and starts busting some more branches for the fire.  
“We’re not them.” Rick tries, leaning forward in the hopes of catching his friend's eye. “Hey. We’re not.”  
“We ain’t them.” Daryl states and stands up. Nell watches as the man studies them before turning and pacing away.

Nell doesn’t realize she’s dozed off until a sudden and loud clap of thunder wakes her. Sitting up straight again, she can see Daryl struggling to hold the barn doors shut and she quickly rushes over.  
Eleanor presses her shoulder against the right door as Daryl turns to push them shut again. Maggie appears at her sister's side, and then Sasha is on Daryl’s left. Rick, Glenn, Carol, and Michonne rush over next. Then Tara, Rosita, Abraham, Eugene, Gabriel, and Carl join. Everyone pushes against the doors and one another. Their feet sliding back but each time they step forward again, as a whole. The wind howls and the storm only grows more violent outside. And along with the storm, the horde of walkers at the door becomes more and more restless.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!


	10. Episode Ten ~ The Distance  (season five, episode eleven)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Violence, gore, cursing, weapon use, injury

Eleanor has no idea how long into the night, or very possibly into the morning, that they all stood against the door. Forcing it to stay shut against the storm and the horde. Hell, she doesn’t remember it ever stopping. But she knows it must have because she wakes on the barn floor. Nearly everyone is laying in their own spots around the barn floor. All of them within arms reach of the next person.  
The scene is somehow comforting to witness as Nell realizes she is one of the first to wake. But a warm weight across her side finally catches the blonde's attention. Glancing down, her blue eyes land on a tan arm that has an almost protective hold on her waist. Carefully Nell turns her head, she spots the familiar head of brown hair tucked into her back and knows that it has to be Tara.  
The slow warmth that rushes up Eleanor’s neck and the fluttering feeling in her stomach makes the blonde woman shift forward. She carefully slips out from under Tara’s arm, wincing when the sleeping woman lightly grabs onto her shirt. A brief moment of panic fills Nell's chest before Tara’s hand falls away. She glances one more time to make sure the brunette is truly asleep before she quickly stands.   
“Nearly as bad as the walk of shame,” Daryl calls quietly.  
Nell can feel the flames flood her pale face. “Shut it, Dixon.” She snaps softly, her eyes shifting to Carol as she stifles a laugh.  
“Sorry, sorry, it’s just. Oh nevermind.” The woman shakes her head with a smile.  
“I need some air.” Nell huffs, quickly walking past the others. Who all seem to be in the process of waking. Nell reaches for the barn doors when Maggie pushes them open.   
“Hey, everyone…” She calls, glancing at Nell as she steps inside. Behind her, a man follows, and Nells grabs the snub nose from her belt on instinct. “This is Aaron.”  
Everyone has the same hesitant reaction. Daryl pushes past and checks outside before he moves forward and quickly pats down the stranger.   
“We met him outside. He’s by himself. We took his weapons and his gear.” Nell keeps her grip on the pistol as she stares at the man. Her eyes glance briefly to Tara, who has gotten up and pulled the barn doors shut behind them. 

“Hi.”  
Judeth’s cries are the only reason Nell turns. She watches as Rick passes the baby girl to her older brother. “It’s nice to meet you.” Aaron tries to step forward, his hand stretching out, but the man is smart enough to stop when everyone’s eyes lock onto his form once more.   
“You said he had a weapon?” Rick asks, his eyes landing on Maggie as she walks past and hands the officer the man's pistol. Rick looks it over before checking the clip and putting the weapon in the back of his belt.  
“There something you need?”  
“He has a camp nearby.” Sasha answers for the stranger. “He wants us to audition for membership.”  
“I wish there was another word. Audition makes it sound like we’re some kind of a dance troupe. That’s only on Friday nights.” Aaron says, and Nell can’t tell if he is joking or not. “Um, and it’s not a camp. It’s a community. I think you all would make valuable additions. But it’s not my call. My job is to convince you all to follow me back home… I know, if I were you, I wouldn’t go either. Not until I knew exactly what I was getting into… Sasha, can you hand Rick my pack?”  
Sasha slowly does as she’s asked. Nell watches her pass before turning her gaze back to the stranger. “Front pocket, there’s an envelope. There’s no way I could convince you to come with me just by talking about our community. That’s why I brought those. I apologize in advance for the picture quality. We just found an old camera store last-”  
“Nobody gives a shit.” Daryl cuts the man off.  
Aaron turns to Daryl and nods. “You’re absolutely one hundred percent right… that’s the first picture I wanted to show you because nothing I say about our community will matter unless you know you’ll be safe. If you join us, you will be…” Aaron looks at Rick again, “Each panel in that wall is a fifteen-foot high, twelve-foot wide slab of solid steel-framed by cold-rolled steel beams and square tubing. Nothing alive or dead gets through that without our say-so.”  
“Like I said, security is obviously important. In fact, there’s only one resource more critical to our community’s survival. The people. Together we’re strong. You can make us even stronger… the next picture, you’ll see inside the gates. Our community was first constructed-”  
The man isn’t able to finish before Rick has made his way forward and thrown a heavy punch. The strangers unconscious before he even hits the floor. Nell moves forward as Daryl and Maggie crouch over the man and checks his pockets.  
“Everybody else, we need eyes in every direction. They’re coming for us. We might not know how or when, but they are.” Nell glances over her shoulder at the officer before her attention is drawn back to her sister.  
“Me and Sasha, we didn’t see him. If he had wanted to hurt us, he could’ve.”  
Rick ignores Maggie’s words and paces. “Anybody see anything?”  
Nell moves to one of the barn windows and carefully keeps an eye out for any movement. “Just a lot of places to hide.” She hears Glenn state.  
“Alright, keep looking.” Nell finds her bow and machete after a few minutes of nothing. 

“That’s a hell of a right cross you got there Rick.” Nell turns as the stranger slowly lifts his head to look at Rick. His hands are now bound.   
“Sit him up,” Rick calls and Maggie tries to disagree.  
“It’s okay.” Aaron nods to Maggie.  
“He’s fine, sit him up.” Michonne and Maggie help the man to move into a seated position,   
“You’re being cautious.” He says, “I completely understand.”  
“How many of your people are out there?” Rick asks, stepping forward as he holds out an orange gun. A flare gun. “You have a flare gun. You have it to signal your people. How many of them are there?”  
“Does it matter?” Aaron asks with a heavy sigh.  
Nell nods, shifting a few steps closer. “Yes, it does.”  
“I mean, of course, it matters how many people are actually out there, but does it matter how many people I tell you are out there? Because I’m pretty sure no matter what number I say - eight, thirty-two, four hundred and forty-four, zero - no matter what I say, you’re not going to trust me.”  
“Well, it’s hard to trust anyone who smiles after getting punched in the face,” Rick states, glancing around slightly before focusing on Aaron again.   
“How about a guy who leaves bottles of water for you on the road?” Aaron asks, and Nell glances back at the group's small amount of food and water.   
“How long have you been following us?” Daryl snaps, stepping forward.  
“Long enough to see that you practically ignore a pack of roamers on your trail. Long enough to see that despite a lack of food and water, you never turned on each other. You’re survivors and you’re people… like I said, and I hope you won’t punch me for saying this, that is the most important resource in the world.”

Everyone shifts, carefully looking to Rick as the barn falls silent. Rick slowly takes a few steps towards the man. “How many others are out there?”  
“One.” Aaron finally states. He shakes his head after a beat. “I knew you wouldn’t believe me. If it’s not words if it’s not pictures, what would it take to convince you that this is for real?”  
Nell shifts closer to her sister as she stands from her kneeled position next to the man. “What if I drove you to the community? All of you? We leave now, we’ll get there by lunch.”  
“I’m not sure how the fifteen of us are going to get the car you and your one friend drove down here in,” Rick states, pointing his hand at the man.  
“We drove separately.” Aaron quickly states. “If we found a group, we wanted to be able to bring them all home. There’s enough room for all of us.”  
“And you’re parked just a couple miles away, right?” Carol asks, causing Aaron to nod.   
“East on Ridge Road, just after you hit Route sixteen. We wanted to get them closer, but then the storm came, blocked the road. We couldn’t clear it.”  
“You, you’ve really thought this through,” Rick says, making Aaron's shoulders deflate slightly.  
“Rick, if I wanted to ambush you, I’d do it here. You know, light the barn on fire while you slept, picked you off as you ran out the only exit. You can trust me.” For a couple of beats, everyone is silent. 

“I’ll check out the cars.” Michonne eventually says, turning to Rick.  
“There aren’t any cars.”  
“There’s only one way to find out.”  
“We don’t need to find out.”  
“We do.” Michonne states, “You know what you know and you’re sure of it, but I’m not.”  
Nell catches Maggie nodding out of the corner of her eye. “Me neither.”  
Rick shakes his head. “Your way is dangerous, mine isn’t.”  
“Passing up someplace where we can live? Where Judeth can live? That’s pretty dangerous… we need to find out what this is… we can handle ourselves.” Michonne states before straightening her back. “So that’s what we’re gonna do.”  
“Then I will, too.” Glenn states, “I’ll go.”  
Nell nods, “So will I.”  
Rick takes a moment before looking over his shoulder at Abraham. “Abraham.”  
“Yeah. I’ll walk with them.” Rick nods and turns to look at Rosita, before he even asks the woman is nodding.  
“Okay.” Nell grabs her pack and checks the quiver attached to its side before she pulls it over her shoulders, doing the same with her bow. “The walkies are out of juice. If you’re not back in sixty minutes, we’ll come. Which might be just what they want.”  
Michonne takes the lead and Nell comes up in the back, but Tara catches her wrist briefly. “Come back.” She states it, but it’s soft like a plead. Eleanor nods, taking the brunette's hand for a second and squeezing before she lets go and follows the others out the barn door.

~~~

After getting on the road, Nell shifts her bow off her shoulder and keeps it at the ready. “Eyes open everybody. Weapons up.” Glenn calls, and Nell notches an arrow. “You see somebody coming at us, you fire.”  
“Copy that,” Abraham calls.  
Nell glances at the man a few paces behind her before focusing her gaze forward again. “So if we see someone, we just shoot them?” Michonne asks.  
“It’s a good question,” Maggie says, and Nell nods.  
“What if they’re someone like us?” Michonne asks, glancing from Glenn to the road ahead of them. “What if Aaron is telling the truth? What if they’re someone who has nothing to do with this?”  
“We’re six people walking with guns. No one’s coming up to say hello.” Glenn states, his voice sharp.  
Nell speaks up. “But that’s exactly what happened.”   
“If it’s someone like us, we should be afraid of them. He said he was watching us, right? It means he saw us yesterday. And after everything we’ve done, why would he want us to join his group?”   
It takes a moment, but Michonne easily responds. “People like us saved a priest. Saved a girl who rolled up to the prison with the Governor. Saved a crazy lady with a sword… he saw that.”   
“I don’t know what he saw.”  
The group slows as they come up to a parked car and RV, their weapons at the ready. “He was telling the truth,” Nell says, moving forward carefully with the others to make their way over a fallen tree - it is blocking off the road.   
“Not one step closer, asshole!” Glenn shoats as a branch snaps. Raising his weapons, along with the rest of the group. Abraham and Rosita take cover at the front of the driver's side of the car. Nell kneels just behind the tree with an arrow notched, trusting Glenn, Maggie, and Michonne at her back. It isn’t until a few walkers stubble out that they relax a bit.  
Nell lets the arrow loose, taking out the first as Abraham and Rosita move forward to handle the other two. She lets the pair move to clear the RV as she retrieves her arrow. After a few long minutes, the two-step back out and state that the vehicle is clear. But stocked with some canned goods.  
“Let’s get back then.”

~~~

After having parked outside the old barn and brought in all the goods, Nell and the others settle in with the rest of the group inside. “This, this is ours now,” Rick states as he stands and takes a few steps closer to the canned foods.  
Aaron nods before the man continues. “It’s ours whether or not we go to your camp.”  
“What do you mean?” Carl asks quickly, Rick turns to his son. “Why wouldn’t we go?”  
“If he were lying or if he wanted to hurt us…” Michonne speaks up, slowly looking around at the group. “But he isn’t and he doesn’t. We need this. So we’re going, all of us… Somebody say something if they feel different.”  
“I don’t know, man,” Daryl says quietly, glancing over at Rick from his seated position. “This barn smells like horse shit.”  
“Yeah.” Rick slowly nods, looking at Michonne. “We’re going... So, where are we going? Where’s your camp?”   
“Well, every time I’ve done this, I’ve been behind the wheel driving recruits back. I believe you’re good people. I’ve bet my life on it. I’m just not ready to bet my friends lives just yet.”  
“You’re not driving.” Michonne says, “So if you want to get home, you’ll have to tell us how.”  
Aaron slowly nods and looks to Rick, who has grabbed the map. “Go north on Route sixteen.”   
“And then?”   
“I’ll tell you when we get there.”   
“We’ll take twenty-three north.” Rick cuts in, “You’ll give us directions from there.”  
“That’s… I don’t know how else to say it, that’s a bad idea. We’ve cleared sixteen. It’ll be faster.”  
“We’ll take twenty-three. We leave at sundown.”  
“We’re doing this at night?” Nell asks, leaning her elbows against the stable wall as she glances at Rick.  
“Look, I know it’s dangerous. But it’s better than riding up to the gates during the day. If it isn’t safe, we need to get gone before they know we’re there.”   
“No one is going to hurt you. You’re trying to protect your group, but you’re putting them in danger.” Aaron states sharply, tugging lightly against the roles behind his back.   
“Tell me where the camp is, we’ll leave right now.” When the man shakes his head, Rick turns to the group. “It’s going to be a long flight. Eat. Get some rest if you can.”

~~~

At Daryl’s knock, everyone moves out into the street. Carl rushes to hug his father and Maggie meets Glenn halfway in a tight hug. Nell follows just behind to hug her best friend and Michonne. But as Aaron starts yelling for Eric, she turns to him.   
“He’s inside.” She finally tells him and the man runs into the building without any interruptions. The group follow Rick inside and wait in the main entrance as the officer goes after Aaron.  
“Excuse me, everyone,” Aaron calls as he and Rick steps into the room. “Thank you. You saved Eric. I owe you. All of you. And I will make sure that debt is paid in full when we get to our community. When we get to Alexandria… now, I’m not sure about you, but I’d rather not do any more driving tonight.”  
A small laugh ripples through the group and Nell leans back against the box Tara has made herself comfortable on top of. “Maybe we can hit the road tomorrow morning.”  
“That sounds fine.” Rick agrees before he continues. “But if we’re staying here for the night, you’re sleeping over there.” He points Aaron to the far corner of the room.  
“Rick, do you really think we need to do that?” Nell asks, stepping forward.  
“It’s the safe play. We don’t know you.” Rick states, glancing at Aaron as the man steps forward.  
“The only way you’re gonna stop me from being with him right now is by shooting me.” The man foes to take another step when Rick doesn’t react, but Glenn holds out a hand.   
“Rick, he told us where the camp is. And he really was only traveling with one other person.” Glenn says, looking between Aaron and Rick, “They’re both unarmed. One of them’s got a broken ankle… I want us to be safe too. I can’t give up everything else. I know what I said, but it doesn’t matter.”  
After a moment, Rick nods. “Alright, alright.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Let me know what ya think!


	11. Episode Eleven ~ Remember  (season five, episode twelve)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Violence, cursing, gore.

As the gates open, Nell can’t stop herself from pausing. Even from the street she can see the houses and can hear the laughter of children and everyday chatter. It is somehow terrifying and exhilarating at the same time.   
Glancing over her shoulder to her sister, Nell can already see that Maggie has the same thoughts running through her head. A sudden rattling from beside the road, however, causing everyone to jump and draw their weapons. Daryl is the first to react, letting loose a bolt from his crossbow and killing the possum that had caused the group to start.  
The hunter reaches over and picks up the animal easily as everyone slowly shifts their attention back to the gate. Which has now completely opened to them. A man stares from behind Aaron, specifically staring at Daryl.   
“We brought dinner,” Daryl says after a beat, not looking away from the man.   
“It’s okay,” Aaron states, waving a hand to them all. “Come on in, guys.”  
At the man’s invitation, everyone paces forward through the gates of Alexandria. The squeaks of the gate's wheels make Nell turn and watch as it is pushed shut. A small part of her wondering if this is the answer.  
“Before we take this any further, I need you to turn over your weapons.” The new man states, glancing over the group slowly. “Stay, you hand them over.”  
“We don’t know if we want to stay,” Rick says cooly, Judeth in one arm and his revolver in his other hand.   
“It’s fine, Nicholas,” Aaron tells the man.  
“If we were going to use them, we would have started already.” Rick states.  
Nell glances around the community, somewhat awestruck by all the housing. “Let them talk to Deanna first.” Aaron nods to Nicholas, making Nell refocus on the conversation.  
“Who’s Deanna?”   
“She knows everything you’d want to know about this place,” Aaron promises before turning to Rick. “Rick, why don’t you start?”  
Everyone shifts and as Rick glances back at them all, the moans of a walker - maybe fifteen yards outside the gate - catches his attention.   
“Sasha.” Sasha turns and just as expected, she raises her suppressed rifle and easily takes down the walker in one shot. The gates close just after and Rick starts leading the group forward. “Good thing we’re here.”

~~~

“Hello,” Nell turns to face the owner of the voice, spotting an older woman who has a small smile. “My name is Deanna Monroe.” Nell stares at her before nodding and turning back around to look out the window again.   
“Do you mind if I record this?”   
Nell turns and looks at the older woman, confusion on her face. “What?”   
Deanna chuckles and smiles again. “Do you mind if I record our talk?” She points to the camera beside her and Nell slowly shakes her head.  
“So, are you going to tell me your name?” Deanna asks after she has turned on the camera and she takes a seat on the couch.  
Nell huffs, “Sorry, my name's Eleanor Greene.”  
“Ah, so you’re Maggie’s older sister?” Nell nods to the woman's question and paces past the fireplace, running her fingers over the trim above it. “Would you like to sit, Eleanor?”  
Nell glances over and signs but takes a seat in the old armchair. “Just call me Nell, feel like I’m in trouble whenever people call me Eleanor.”  
“Would you mind telling me about your group and yourself?” Deanna asks, leaning back and crossing her legs as she eyes the younger woman.   
“Their good people, if that’s what you’re gettin’ at.” Nell states, resting her bow on her thighs and fidgeting with the string.  
“And what about you?”  
Nell looks up with frowned brows at Deanna's question. “What about me?”  
“Are you a good person?”   
Nell pauses, thinking for a beat before shrugging. “Depends on what you think good is.. I’ve done shit I would gladly never think of again. I’ve killed people to survive and to make sure my family survives… So, I don’t know… Maybe I am, maybe I’m not.”  
“Do you regret killing those people?” Deana asks.  
Nell finally meets the older woman's gaze, shaking her head. “No.” Her hands stop fidgeting as she continues. “If I hadn’t of killed those people, they would’ve killed Maggie, or Glenn, or Tara, or Beth-”  
Nell stands when her baby sister's name leaves her lips. Pacing back around the chair and crossing her arms as she looks out the window. “Who’s Beth?”  
“She was my baby sister.” Nell slowly states, having to clear her throat to keep her voice from wavering. “And she was killed. I wasn’t there and she was killed because- because she wanted to protect Noah.”  
“I am sorry.” Deana starts.  
“Don’t.” Nell cuts her off and shakes her head. “Can we be done?”

~~~

“They’re still your guns,” Deana promises as everyone slowly hands over their weapons. “You can check them out whenever you go beyond the wall. But inside here, we store them safely.”  
Nell stands besides Daryl, watching as everyone hands over their weapons. She keeps herself from reacting when Carol awkwardly hands over her rifle. The woman acts like she can barely hold the weapon as everyone watches. The woman, Olivia, as Deana had introduced her, smiles and pulls away the cart.   
“Should have brought another bin.” She jokes.”

After being led to the house, Nell can barely believe her eyes. After a while, the blonde finally got her chance to shower and clean up. A part of her forgetting what it feels like to stand under a running shower. Or to be able to brush her teeth and hair. It feels like it has been years since she has been able to really feel clean. To not have blood and dirt caked to her skin.  
When she steps out of the shower, Eleanor can’t stop staring at herself in the mirror. The stitches that had been in her forehead have been removed but left a faint scar that disappears into her hairline. Her freckles have darkened so much since she last took the time to look at her own reflection. It’s odd, seeing how different her body is - compared to before. Now she is lean and scared from surviving. Her eyes hesitate to look at her ribs and hip. The burn is still there, bright pink scar tissue standing out against her pale skin. Even if she could forget that night, her body would never allow her to.

Everyone had agreed that staying in the same house was the best choice. The safest choice. It is obviously a bit crowded in the house, everyone having found a spot in the living room to be. But Nell doesn’t really mind. Sitting with her back against the couch, Tara sprawled on the floor beside her, head in Nell’s lap.   
The blonde can’t find it in herself, despite trying, to be hesitant. Something about this place feels safe. Sure they had just gotten here, and of course, Nell would keep her wits about her. But now, for the night. She would let herself sleep, without one eye open.  
When someone knocks at the door, everyone shifts to see who it is as Rick opens the door. Deana’s barely stepped inside before she is pausing and staring at Rick. “Wow.”  
The officer groans and releases his grip on the doorknob. “I didn’t know that was under there. Listen, I don’t mean to interrupt. I just wanted to stop by and see how you were all settling.” Deana says, glancing inside the room.   
A wide smile breaks across her face as she takes in the group. “Oh, my… staying together. Smart.”  
“No one said we couldn’t.” Rick states.  
Deana nods. “You said you’re a family. That’s what you said. Absolutely amazing to me how people with completely different backgrounds and nothing in common can become that… Don’t you think?”  
“Everybody said you gave them jobs.”   
The older woman nods with a smile, “Mm-hmm. Yeah. Part of this place. Looks like the communists won after all.”  
“Well, you didn’t give me one.”   
“I have. I just haven’t told you yet.” Deana states, “Same with Michonne. I’m closing in on something for Sasha. And I’m just trying to figure Mr. Dixon out, but I will.” As she turns to leave, Deana eyes Rick one more time. “You look good.”

~~~

Waking with a start, Nell nearly screams when she feels a hand on her side. But she suppresses the urge just as quickly as it comes. She glances at the sleeping woman beside her, Tara, who murmurs something before turning her back to Nell.   
The blonde can’t quite explain why the sight of Tara comforts her racing heart, but it does. Outside it is still dark, but Eleanor needs air - so that is where she goes. She has to bite her tongue when she spots Daryl sitting on the porch railing. A cigarette in his hand.  
She doesn’t say anything at first but walks over to lean against the post nearest to the hunter. He acknowledges her with a nod of his head.   
“Can I have one?” Nell asks, eyeing the pack next to Daryl’s foot on the rail.   
“Go ahead.”   
Nell takes out a cigarette and Darly hands her his lighter. It is a few long moments of silence before Daryl speaks up again. “She wrote somethin’ on your letter, y’know.”  
It takes Eleanor several beats to piece together what the man is saying. “What?”  
“Beth.” He grunts. “She scribbled something on that letter you wrote to her.”  
Eleanor slowly reaches into her jean pocket and pulls out the note. Staring silently as she reads her baby sister's name on the front fold before she unfolds it. 

‘Nellie,   
I don’t think I will get to see you or Maggie again. But I want you to know I love you, and I love Maggie. You two have helped me through so much. I am sorry I won’t get to return the favor. But I know you will make it.   
But promise me you won’t just survive Nell, promise me you will live. 

The writing is jumbled and scribbled on the bottom half of the page. It is fairly clear she had been rushing to write the words down. Nell had only filled a few lines when she wrote it and drawn a small robin in the top corner.   
The blonde doesn't even realize she is crying until the tears hit the page. She quickly turns her head away and folds the page once more. She carefully tucks it away again before she wipes her eyes and looks at Daryl.  
“Thank you.”  
“For what?”   
“For being there for her.” Nell doesn’t elaborate further, instead just smiling at the man and making her way to the door. Once inside, Nell takes a breath and quietly walks back over to the spot on the floor she had been sleeping.  
Tara is rubbing her face as she sits. “You okay?” The words are whispered and rough from sleep, but the worry is clear enough for Nell to see.   
“I will be.” Nell smiles softly as she lays down again. She hesitates before she finds Tara’s hand in the dark. “I will be.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THE END!!   
> I did it! Hell yeah! I hope you guys found enjoyment/entertainment from this fic. I know I was gone a while but I finished it and I am proud of it. Thank you for letting me share this here and please let me know your final thoughts in the comments!

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for sticking around! Please comment thoughts and options! I love feedback!


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